[ He looks away from Gen, not so much out of shame but an excuse — here's his drink, and he can take a long, slow sip of it while staring out across the other side of the bar instead. He knows he's being stared at, being judged. Probably by more people than Gen, really, but that really doesn't make a difference; Gen's opinion of him is the only one here he cares about.
He sets his glass back down at Gen's huff, though. Looks him in the eye when he speaks, willing his gaze from travelling up a little further, to that scar of Innocence in his hair. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He's not going to shy away from this, though. He doesn't deserve to. He's just going to end up being an open book before Gen anyway, no matter what he does.
That knowledge makes it easier to answer him. ]
I hurt you. Deliberately. [ His voice is flat when he speaks, almost clinical. At least laying it out for him now makes it easier for Amos to tamper down his emotions. These are facts, nothing more. ] Didn't think you'd want to be around me again.
[ ... No, tampering down his emotions was a lie. Turns out it still hurts to think about this after all, like that wasn't a main catalyst for him feeling the need to try to drink and fuck it all away, and he can't exactly suppress that sharp pang of emotion.
He doesn't look away from Gen, though. He doesn't deserve to run and hide anymore. ]
no subject
He sets his glass back down at Gen's huff, though. Looks him in the eye when he speaks, willing his gaze from travelling up a little further, to that scar of Innocence in his hair. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He's not going to shy away from this, though. He doesn't deserve to. He's just going to end up being an open book before Gen anyway, no matter what he does.
That knowledge makes it easier to answer him. ]
I hurt you. Deliberately. [ His voice is flat when he speaks, almost clinical. At least laying it out for him now makes it easier for Amos to tamper down his emotions. These are facts, nothing more. ] Didn't think you'd want to be around me again.
[ ... No, tampering down his emotions was a lie. Turns out it still hurts to think about this after all, like that wasn't a main catalyst for him feeling the need to try to drink and fuck it all away, and he can't exactly suppress that sharp pang of emotion.
He doesn't look away from Gen, though. He doesn't deserve to run and hide anymore. ]