It hits Amos after a second: Gen. After he'd gone and completely fucked things up there, hurt him, she'd been the one to rescue him, too. Not that he'd ever had anything but a positive opinion of Misa, but Amos has so much more respect for her now. Recognizes that in her own way, she's probably one of the strongest among them.
And how he's made that weaken in this moment, the way her words don't ring quite the way they should. It makes sense, though. You can't be at your best all the time. So he finally just... wore her out.
He needs to not do that again. ]
I'm sorry.
[ It's... nothing, it's kinda everything. He isn't trying to self-flagellate anymore; there's no self-loathing behind the words this time. Just a simple matter of fact: whatever got him completely fucked up back in Venera, he had scared her. And a lot of other people, too. It really is all he can do to offer that sentiment and mean it, but now it's less I'm sorry I put you through that, more I'm sorry you went through that, period.
He takes a deep breath, steeling himself. ]
I don't know if you would've figured something out. Other people tried. [ Ciel. Matt. ] They were brutal. It should've worked. I just ended up brushing them off.
[ A long pause. ]
Guess you know now, though. So if something like that happens again... use it. Tear me down. I can take it. Wouldn't have made it here at all if I couldn't.
[ To Achamoth, to Horos, to adulthood. Take your pick, really. ]
cw reference to past suicidal ideation
It hits Amos after a second: Gen. After he'd gone and completely fucked things up there, hurt him, she'd been the one to rescue him, too. Not that he'd ever had anything but a positive opinion of Misa, but Amos has so much more respect for her now. Recognizes that in her own way, she's probably one of the strongest among them.
And how he's made that weaken in this moment, the way her words don't ring quite the way they should. It makes sense, though. You can't be at your best all the time. So he finally just... wore her out.
He needs to not do that again. ]
I'm sorry.
[ It's... nothing, it's kinda everything. He isn't trying to self-flagellate anymore; there's no self-loathing behind the words this time. Just a simple matter of fact: whatever got him completely fucked up back in Venera, he had scared her. And a lot of other people, too. It really is all he can do to offer that sentiment and mean it, but now it's less I'm sorry I put you through that, more I'm sorry you went through that, period.
He takes a deep breath, steeling himself. ]
I don't know if you would've figured something out. Other people tried. [ Ciel. Matt. ] They were brutal. It should've worked. I just ended up brushing them off.
[ A long pause. ]
Guess you know now, though. So if something like that happens again... use it. Tear me down. I can take it. Wouldn't have made it here at all if I couldn't.
[ To Achamoth, to Horos, to adulthood. Take your pick, really. ]