aionlogs | [open] you know what your problem is?

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[open] you know what your problem is?

WHO: Amos, any Kenoma
WHAT: Amos rewards himself for being cured of Innocence by going on a depression bender.
WHERE: Throughout Achamoth
WHEN: Towards the end of/after the event
WARNINGS: Depression, self-loathing, a little suicidal ideation, lots of drinking, references to brothels, discussion of domestic violence/sexual assault/prostitution/child prostitution; will update as necessary

[ So, this sucks.

Getting out of Venera as soon as possible had been the only thing on Amos' mind once Misa had forced him out of Innocence's grip. That thing had exploited his vulnerabilities, manipulated him, turned him into a puppet to spread its nonsensical, fucked up ~~somewhat understandable~~ agenda, and he needed to leave immediately, before he fell victim to it again.

His legacy's shrine is one of the closest to Achamoth. Easy.

He had to swim across a lake and spend days walking across farmland in waterlogged boots before he actually made it back to the city. Less easy.

Though for all of the personal discomfort and frustration that brought with it, it was readily ignored by spending that time mentally reviewing everything he did while he was fucked in the head, now that he could with proper context. All of the harm he'd caused, all of the ways he'd refused to listen to reason, being reminded of the fact that all he's really good for is ruining other people's lives. Turns out that sucks.

Then there's the fact that ever since an initial mishap during one of his first days in Achamoth, he's been careful to not go out into the city with his shard exposed — but since anything he'd used to cover it up had ended up getting destroyed in Venera, he has no choice but to subject himself to. This. When he's the last person who should be revered or admired in any way, and now he has no way to avoid it.

The first stop on Amos' list is somewhere that can get him clothed again, courtesy of I don't have any money but I am an Aion can I please just have a shirt now. All subsequent stops are, well... ]

i. so just drinking and fucking

[ Going back to the Citadel isn't even remotely on his mind, certainly not when he's got plenty of self-pity to wallow in.

Amos sticks to the seedier parts of Achamoth, weaving his way through various bars and brothels as the mood strikes him. He still doesn't have any money on him, so it's a whole lot of showing off his shard to get either free booze, comped sex, or serve as a credible IOU (and one that, to the meagre credit he has left, he'll actually fulfil once he's had the chance to get his head back on straight and reacquire finances from the Citadel). It isn't hedonism he's fully sinking into so much as I'm a bad person, I feel like shit, I'm going to do things that physically make me feel less like shit. There are worse coping mechanisms, he figures; if there actually aren't, he doesn't care.

He ignores all communion messages he feels coming through; the best anyone can hope for if they try to reach out to him directly is a tacit acknowledgment that he's still alive, combined with maybe a somewhat hazy impression of his immediate surroundings, if that latter part ends up slipping through.

That, or maybe you just so happen to run into him in some shithole dive bar or upon leaving a brothel.

Either way, there really isn't a whole lot he can do if you end up in physically the same space as him, is there. ]

ii. till they run out of one or the other

[ At some point, he actually does have to go back to the Citadel.

He's clearly worse for the wear when he finally shows back up there, rough around the edges when he finally delivers his report to Xishen — several days late, but who's counting — and then has free reign of... well, not the entire place, but the usual.

Fuck, does he need a shower. And a nap. And maybe another drink, because why the hell not. Even though he may not necessarily look it, Amos is certainly feeling better; otherwise, he wouldn't have ended up back here.

Maybe he's dishevelled, maybe he's finally had the chance to clean up; maybe he's briefly roaming the hallways, maybe he's taking advantage of having his own spacious room again. Either way, he's certainly more receptive to company, having gotten most of... that... out of his system in the city.

Though Amos isn't forgetting how easily led astray he was, all in the name of hurting people, anytime soon. That part still bothers him, but when hasn't that been a regular part of his psyche, anyway. ]

iii. wildcard

[ I'm at arii#6412 or

cadiai if we need to talk specifics. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Well, that was unexpected from her... and really endearing, actually, so he raises a playful eyebrow in response. ]

As spicy as you got. Food options are pretty limited in space. Gotta get your flavour from somewhere.

[ ... Can he go toe-to-toe with her? Maybe?? Hell, either way, he wants to try now. It's more pleasant than thinking about that... other shit. Amos scrunches his face up a little, because he really can't argue with her, can he? ]

Dunno if having the opportunity now would make a difference. [ But yes, he is conceding in the way he relents, his body language slumping in turn: he definitely never had the opportunity before. ] You wanna do a debrief, though, I'm good with that. Whenever, really. Except—

[ Ah, there's his stomach again. He looks back up at her, wondering just what else it is she's going to be completely correct about. ]

How much am I gonna be loading these up? [ He tilts his head to the bread slices, to the baskets of other food soon to go in between them. He really is hungry, after all — and completely at her mercy today.

And it probably will be better talking about all that other shit on a full stomach, huh. ]

Aha, that's a good point. I can't imagine, and I don't think I want to either! [She admits sheepishly with a small laugh, though it's half playing along too at this point.] The selection I've found in Achamoth isn't as spicy as I would like, but we make do with what we have. Okay, give me a moment!

[Gotta wait for Godsblood for The Good Stuff apparently, and she eats spicy. They have something akin to sriracha sauce here at least, so that's what she'll be stepping away to fetch from another cupboard amidst way too many. She seems to know exactly where the hot sauce is, though that may not be surprising, given her earlier reaction...

That is, she's back within the minute, cheerily handing him a glass bottle filled with a red sauce.]

? Until you're full, when else? [Like the sky is blue and water is wet? What a silly question.] If you think you'll like more food, we could have one of the kitchen staff whip you up something else nice and quick, like a salad maybe? You're a large and active man, of course you should eat your fill. You need the energy!

[Not that today's itinerary is particularly charged, what with "making cookies" and "decompress Venera" coming up next, but it's the spirit of it! (Besides, who knows how lousy his diet had been before coming back to the citadel...)]

[ He does give her a small smile, a nod at the idea that she doesn't want to think about how limited food options are in space. Tell him about it, really; it's been months and he's still getting used to just how good everything here is, no matter what it is. Anything from a basic salad to a the sweetest dessert is. It's incredible.

So it's with good humour that he waits for her to come back, leaning against the table with the ever-growing sense that things could be so much worse. He's still lucky to be here. After Venera, after all of it. He's in a good place.

Amos huffs softly at her answer as he accepts the bottle, pushes himself off the table to assemble himself something proper. ] Yeah, alright, [ and it really has been some time since anyone fussed over him like this.

... It's kinda nice. Not that he's interested in admitting that part out loud, too busy cutting off thick slices of salami before reaching to do the same with the cheese. It's. They're going to be some pretty tall sandwiches, that much is clear.

It's when he's reaching for the tomatoes that he looks back over at her. ]

Did you want anything? Or did you already eat?

[ Or were you just going to eat cookies only— He's already been pushing his luck ever since he came to the kitchen, it feels like; he'll cut himself off there. ]

[Born in countryside France and then having traveled a fair bit all over due to work, Ciel had certainly been spoiled in contrast. Achamoth is far from lacking too, as it receives imports from the entire continent of Horos, but she is still on the lookout for garam masala, cumin, and cilantro of the best quality, or any spices of similar nature because... the heart (stomach...) wants what it wants, yes. In the meanwhile, the presence of the children is pushing her to bake more: who is she to deny them, especially when she is genuinely experienced in the craft? It's albeit not something she'd had the opportunity to revisit because of work back in her world, but here with the help of the citadel's kitchen staff, it seems like she IS getting her second chance, wholly unexpected as it may be.

(No sense looking at a gift horse in the mouth. It's all the more to pass on too, when all's said and done.)

She happily watches Amos go at it, but at his prodding, straightens herself and takes a step back. --Ah, right. Almost got carried away, there! Oops.]

I've already eaten, yes. Didn't I just say I don't believe in working on an empty stomach? [Also lunchtime was a few hours ago, but that seems... less effective to remark about.] Please, take your time and don't hold back! I should be checking up on my helpers anyway, do let one of the kitchen staff know if you need anything else. Bon appétit!~

[As if on cue, one of the aforementioned staff is coming over to drop a glass of water on the table at his side. With a wink, a nod, and a twirl in her step, she's sauntering back to supervising and helping with the cookie baking. There's a LOT to make, starting with an extra batch at the very least; even if the kids (and Amos) don't decimate them all this very day, they're also good to keep as snacks for the rest of the week. Can't go wrong with a little extra, now can they?]

[ Time is relative when you're coming out of a funk and have what feels like limitless access to resources, okay, Ciel. Lunchtime is more a state of mind than a specific time.

... He'll settle back into a routine resembling something actually human, something that the kids can actually look up to, later. Seems like he isn't quite done with being self-indulgent, though he is slowly getting there. And stuffing his face with food is probably better than drowning himself in alcohol, so can he really even be criticized now?

So Amos shoots her a look that makes it clear he's been thoroughly called out as his water gets delivered, and acquiesces her presence. She wins again.

...

Three massive sandwiches later (do nOT call him out, damnit) Amos finds her again. Surely her ammunition against him has run out by now, so... ]

How far along are we?

[ Yes he still has room for cookies. And if this means he can delay the whole debrief thing then, well, he's got no problems doing that either. ]

[Time is always relative, tbh? Amos went to space, it must be even wackier to keep track of time up there. Also they've been in Achamoth for like ~2 months but it probably doesn't feel like it either, so he's valid?

Eating is good tho yes, getting nutrients in your flesh sack is important even if it's just a container for your soul gem here on Horos! He may or may not feel the eyes of the kids on him again, between fits of giggles and chatting among themselves. They seem to just be hanging out in the kitchen for fun, not helping but not making things difficult for anyone either. Ciel's still busy with the baking endeavors, but as a big eater in her own right, of course Amos won't catch flak for the size of his appetite from her end!

By the time he's hit her up, she's in the process of pulling out a tray from the oven: a fresh batch of shortbread cookies just finished baking, round, golden, and looking just right.]

About halfway in, I'd say? [The tray is placed onto the counter, next to another full one that was taken out moments earlier.] If you'd like a taste test, please take from the plate, these are getting wrapped after we let them cool for a bit. [Gesturing with a small tilt of her head towards the other side of the counter, there is indeed a porcelain plate holding about a dozen or so cookies away from all the ingredients and utensils.] After that, would you like to help with the packaging or the dough making?

[Seems like the plan consists of "bake a truckload of cookies" and "wrap four at a time in pre-cut sheets of paper" for a small cylinder-shaped snack package, judging by what the helpers are doing. And going by... everything happening in this corner of the kitchen, every single kid in the citadel is getting one. Is Amos ready to pitch in?]

[ ... Yeah, everything here feels like it takes a lot less time than it did in space, for sure. Throw teleportation into the mix and... yeah. The days really do just fly by.

Amos looks back at the kids looking at him, but hey, they're kids. They should be allowed to have a good time, just sit and wait on somebody else to make cookies for them. He'd absolutely be doing exactly what Ciel has already taken the initiative on if he'd had the mind for it, he just doesn't. Is more than happy to follow along and take someone else's lead, but he's been very busy with his selfish period up until recently, so, you know. There's only so much that can be reasonably expected from him.

... The temptation to take one of those cookies straight from the tray is. Strong. Ciel must have sensed that, the way she'd immediately warned him, so Amos pivots like it was his idea all along to take one from the plate. He's already taken a big bite from it before she's finished her question, a little noise of bliss emerging from him as he chews, because yeah, it's good. That hits the spot.

He even has the decency to swallow before answering. ]

Dough making. Kinda feels like I should be getting my hands dirty. [ So to speak. Besides, it's probably more active, and he could use it. Let his arms get to work, and all that. ] This feels like it could be industrial sized. We setting up a shop or something?

[ We, because he's decided he's firmly a part of this now. And his spirits have increasingly lifted the longer he's been in the kitchen, so yeah, he's gonna be happy to see this through to the end. ]

[Pounding away at dough does seem like it would fit Amos better, but it doesn't feel entirely polite to say out loud either, so Ciel simply smiles in agreement. Or rather, keeps the same smile she's already wearing by the time he's given his wordless approval of how they taste: simple as shortbread cookies are (to make too, difficult to mess up!), they ARE good as is. Now that the man's spoken for himself, though...]

Haha, I don't think I have the time or capital for that. I don't want to give the skilled bakeries of Achamoth competition either. [Dog cafés would be a different matter, but Ciel doesn't know that just yet.] I've just been telling the kids things about my world, and how Children's Day is celebrated in June came up. Since that translates to Visoseri here, they all wanted treats, so here we are. [Sigh (small, but melodramatic)!] So now, it's only fair that everyone gets their share. This way, if you would please?

[And just like that, the next few hours fly by the blink of an eye as they see to it that every orphaned child under the Citadel's care gets their own little packaging of shortbread cookies sprinkled with a dash of brightly colored sugar crystals. Ciel was ready to help with the cleanup too, but after everything today, the kitchen and caretaker staff insist that the great Aions be on their way and rest, just leave the rest to them. So much, in fact, that both her and Amos will find themselves being enthusiastically escorted out of the kitchen, along with a tin can also full of cookies once every child's portion had been accounted for. It's 'their rightful share', as it goes.]

...Goodness. I would wonder if we've overstayed our welcome, but they were very nice about it. [Very much less "please get out" and more "you've done so much already leave the details to us", the kids have long left too after getting their share of cookies. The black haired boy, Charles as he was called, took some convincing, but he ultimately left too with one of the servants.]

How are you feeling, Amos? It didn't end up being too troublesome, I hope?

[As she hands him the tin of cookies, an 'Adult Portion' that could... admittedly, also last anywhere between a few hours to a few days. The oven being constantly on did make it hot, white patches of flour here and there on one's person can't be helped either, but otherwise, the work they had to do, the atmosphere, and the banter children and servants provided did make it a bustling and productive experience.

Though now that they're simply standing in the hallway... Hm. Where to, next?]

[ Children's Day, huh... He has no idea what that is, but it sounds nice. And hey, if it gets the kids here a bunch of cookies, then it really can only be a good thing. Amos was already happy to go along with this, but now that he knows it's for a good cause, Ciel really can just get him to do whatever she wants.

Which would have included cleanup, except the speed with which they're ushered out of there is almost breathtaking. He huffs at her comment about the staff being pleasant in agreement, but now they really are directionless, huh. ]

'm good. [ He accepts the tin from her, already cracking it open to rescue a cookie from inside. He's earned this. ] Really needed a day like that, I think.

[ He's not lying. Getting the chance to actually be around people again, let alone kids, his one weakness... to do something nice for them. After days of being mired in his own selfishness, maybe this, more than anything else, gave him the snap back to reality he'd needed. Or at least a long-term one that's going to stick.

So he offers the partially opened tin to Ciel, if she wants to take one of the fruits of their labours now, too. If Amos earned his, then she's earned her share more than twice over. That's all he can think of for what's next, it having been a busy enough day to have made him forget about any awkwardness he'd had upon seeing her again for the first time since. Venera.

What's a little trying to drag someone you trust down into the depths of Innocence with you when you spent the better part of the day making cookies with them, anyway? Surely it's completely behind them now. ]

Thank you for helping, you did seem to take very well to all this too. [And she doesn't just mean how effective he was at making dough; he got along with the helper staff and the kids, there was an ease to him she hasn't seen Amos display anywhere else so far.] Do you like children, Amos?

[It seems like a natural thing to ask, and at his offer, she accepts it by plucking a single cookie out of the tin. She doesn't eat it just yet though, holding it near her face pensively while still maintaining a peppy and relaxed demeanor.]

Well then, what now... [As if she didn't set the rest of the day's itinerary already, but hmm.] Shall we go for a walk, or would you like to rest a bit and sit down somewhere?

[So that they can talk :) As agreed previously, yes?]

Yeah. [ He does like kids. A beat, a pause for uncertainty, and... ] You think I took well to this?

[ He knows she just said that, but. For as much as he likes kids. Wants them to generally have a good time. Get the chance to just be kids. He never knows if he's actually doing it right; if he's making a positive impact on them. Most of the time, he doesn't really care how he comes off, but if he ever found himself mistreating a kid for whatever reason — sheer ignorance on his part in all likelihood, maybe stress — well. That'd be the number one thing that'd send him right back out to a downward spiral in the seedier parts of Achamoth, wouldn't it.

... So if Ciel, someone he already looks up to, thought he did a good job, then... that's something really heartwarming. Which isn't a common experience for him, but here...

He looks back over at her. ]

We can walk. Probably good to stretch the legs a bit again. I got nowhere to go, though.

[ In other words, lead the way. Physically and verbally, because he sure as shit ain't gonna bring up talking things out. Hours spent in a kitchen and getting the notion put in his head that he's done something good today are more than enough for him than to consider discussion of something he's decided is behind him.

But Ciel's already proven it only takes a bit of light bullying from her to get him to do anything, so... ]

I do, yes. [She answers easily, but after a beat, throws a glance his way.] Do you think you have a good reason to believe otherwise, Amos?

[He was patient, he humored the kids. He gave them his time of the day when they got a little unruly. They can be whimsical and have a penchant for chaos, but isn't that just people in general? What did he think it took, spending time with them and entertaining them?

At his expressed preference, she hums in agreement with a nod and begins leading the way. The citadel is a pretty big place with several courtyards, training and decorative alike; they won't run out of new places to get to, with all the zigzags it may take to reach every last one.

Well then.]

You're not blaming yourself over what I happened, I hope?

[Let's start with that.]

[ It's such a simple question, and one that makes him wonder why he'd even thought to question her in the first place. He's silent for a moment, trying to find an appropriate answer for her, but... there really isn't one. ]

Guess not. [ He's actually a little in awe of himself as he says it, looking back up at her, kinda surprised. ] I'm just not used to things being so... easy.

[ It had come naturally, that time in the kitchen with the kids. He hadn't even thought to question it at the time, so why is he now? Was it just him, though, or was it Ciel having a good effect on him?

... Either way, all that matters is that it was a good day. So. He's content to walk alongside her, cookie tin in hand (but lid back in place, because it's not like they need to eat the thing in one go. Walking is probably preventing them from just completely going to town, actually).

And then Ciel hits him with that new question, and even though Amos' wince is internal, it's probably still easy to perceive. Just give him a moment to collect his thoughts first and, then... ]

Don't really got anyone else to blame. [ His voice is clinical. Detached. And yet, still a casual drawl. ] That was still me, doing all that shit. I can own that. Not like I'm proud of it, but I'm done running from it now.

Well, you're very welcome to come help out and spend more time with the kids whenever you like, Barnaby is often with them too. The citadel staff and the children are very used to us by now, I'm sure they wouldn't mind one more Aion as playmate. Just be ready to get asked if they can climb onto your shoulders a lot, okay~?

[The ~~warning~~ prediction is made with a sideway glance towards him that... Was that a wink? That may have been a wink. She doesn't skip a beat in her step or with the conversation, but does allow a brief pause to cool before continuing with more sobriety.]

I can understand your reasoning, that this world has entities capable of interfering with us on such a scale is... a rude awakening. [To put it mildly. She got lucky.] Nevertheless, it's best to look forward. Have you spoken to others you came across, back then?

[She tilts her head slightly, blue eyes watching him attentively.]

[ A beat of silence, and: ] I think I'd like that.

[ Since arriving in Achamoth, he's spent a lot of time out and about, away from the Citadel. A lot of the time spent in it has been more devoted to training and just enjoying the luxuries it has to offer, including the peace and quiet he can get simply by existing in his own, remarkably spacious room. But to actually be an active participant in these kids' lives... He's really not entirely sure why he hasn't done that before, especially considering how they're all here for the long haul. And if Ciel and Barnaby are doing it... if he can have a day like today...

There's a soft smile from him as he makes a bit of a show of shrugging his shoulders in response to her wink. Yeah, sure. He'd let them. They're certainly broad enough, he's only gotten stronger since coming here... why not? It'd be as good a fit as anything else.

And then his smile fades. Rude awakening is certainly one way to put it, isn't it. But at her question, Amos breaks her gaze, staring at the spot ahead of them as they walk, at nothing, gaze directed more inward than anywhere else.

After a moment, ] Gen. Matt. [ A longer beat of silence. ] Misa. I think things are okay now, it's just... [ What are the words for this... ] I don't like that there's something out there that can fuck me up like that.

Okay. You can ask any of the servants to show you the way, Barnaby and I too if you'd like to go together next time. [The orphans' quarters of the citadel is no secret, of course they're granted ample space for living and other activities as their well-being IS important Regent policy. They're not exactly isolated from the other parts of the citadel, it's more like the kids are taught to not wander so that they don't accidentally get caught in adult business. They're allowed to roam a bit with adequate supervision, of course, and the earlier excursion to the kitchen did fall under that.

...As for the tougher topic.]

If you talked it out and are at an understanding, then it should be okay. Checking up on each other is something within our power to do, unlike predicting what else this world may throw at us next.

[Though, on a tangent, and she cants her head towards him with mild curiosity in her eyes.]

Are you close with Minegishi, Amos?

[Calling him 'Gen' is probably fine in front of Amos, but having familiarity with Japanese honorifics on top of her own strenuous relationship with the teen has her default to his family name.]

I should do that.

[ It's a gentle sort of affection from him, and the kind he's gonna follow through on later. When he's got himself more put together again. A promise — a real one, not the kind you say you'll take into consideration and then leave at that — that he will hit Ciel up at some point in the near future. (Probably not Barnaby. As far as Amos knows, he wants him to stay away from him... That mood might change when he decides to be an enthusiastic participant on a particular beach outing, but until then...)

Followed up by a nod when Ciel mentions talking things out. Yeah. In some ways, things might even be better now—

So her question throws Amos, taking him back and leaving him blinking in surprise at it, both for the use of his family name and the question itself. Amos is an informal person to begin with, plus technically American, plus Gen's never seemed to have a problem with him calling him by his first name, so, when he regains his bearings after a second or two... ]

Yeah. I'm sure he'd say something different, but yeah. We get along well.

[ Probably well beyond sharing a legacy, though that certainly doesn't hurt. He eyes Ciel curiously, though. Gen's way up there for people he'd credit as having helped him deal with Venera as of late. What's this about... ]

[...]

Please keep an eye on him. He'd probably insist on how he's prepared to do whatever it takes to accomplish what we have to do, but he wasn't brought up as a weapon or a tool.

[She states quietly, though her expression does cloud with notable unease as she adverts her eyes despite asking something of him. Gen's a normal teenager when all's said and done, bad attitude and all. She's not sure how well Amos may take such a request, as she knows for a fact he himself hasn't had a 'normal' upbringing. Hopefully that last bit, 'a weapon or a tool', is telling enough about what she means: Gen isn't a killer, and he shouldn't be in a hurry to take the front lines as if he's got nothing else worth doing.]

[ Amos exhales, soft and low at the request. He doesn't avert his own gaze, watching Ciel, the way this seems to be trending somewhere uncomfortable for her. ]

He already has. [ Insisted. Amos reaches up to absently scratch at the back of his neck with his free hand. ] I figure something got him fucked up when he was younger. Not like us, but... something.

[ Which really could be anything. His free arm falls back to his side, limp. He hasn't taken his eyes off of her. ]

He wants to be treated like an adult, and I ain't gonna get in his way there. Pretty much would be considered one where I'm from. But I hear ya. I'm not interested in letting things get too far if I can stop that from happening.

[ A beat. ]

If I can't, then I told him I'd be there for him if he needed it after, too.

[At his answer, her shoulders heave, and she gives a weary sign.]

Something, but not like us.

[She echoes after him, affirmative and resigned in equal parts.]

He's a teenager all the same, talks and acts like plenty others I've seen from my world. Teenagers are also notorious for being impulsive, reckless, bad at knowing their own limits, making stupid decisions, getting into trouble, and biting off more than they can chew.

[A short beat, and she briefly closes her eyes.]

But I know, there's also the reality of our collective situation. We're at war, and the Pleromas aren't going to simply give in. Sooner or later, something will happen. [With him, to him, surrounding him. All are possibilities. And next time, she may not be able to stop him like she had at the Lovers' Shrine.]

So I understand, doing what you can would be more than enough. If I can help you with that in any capacity without his knowing, please let me know. Please don't mention any of this to him though, or that I asked you about him too. He wouldn't take it well

[It's very much not subtle, no, that they're not on good terms. Things are as they are, though, and it's only fair Amos is warned so that he doesn't bring Ciel up in front of Gen and potentially risk anything between them. She'd just like for the teen to be watched and accompanied by someone who cares, it doesn't matter if she can't do it herself. That's... all.]

[ He nods along at her description of teenagers, even feeling some degree of nostalgia; yeah, that's what Amos had been like, too. Turns out the first person he'd ever killed he... wasn't actually supposed to... so, whoops.

Hadn't ended up biting off more than he could chew, though. Almost did. But things had worked out for him, and that's the kind of thing that's gonna colour his perspective; potentially not for the better.

Certainly not when Ciel indicates that Gen wouldn't want her around at all. Or knowing about any of this. That actually is news to him, as obvious as she makes it now. It's a weird one — he likes the both of them, a lot. Would do just about anything for Gen to keep him safe. Would follow Ciel's lead, because she's got a good head on her shoulders. Finding out the two of them are at odds is... hm.

So Amos is silent for a bit, mulling those realities over. When he speaks up again, it's all understanding, all business. ]

I'm not gonna bring it up to him that you said any of this. Won't deny it if he figures it out on his own, but might get lucky and he'll just take it out on me. That'd be fine. Don't think he really means it when he does that. [ Against the odds — mostly the ones Gen has constructed — they've ended up relatively close. There probably isn't any long-term damage to be had there. ] I get it, though. Wish whatever had happened to him hadn't. Better to make sure nothing like it ever has to again. Anything I can do to ensure that, I will.

[ So she's officially got a partner in crime, as it were.

A beat, a moment's hesitation, and: ] Was that all — you just wanted to make sure he'd be okay?

[ Not that he's arguing with any of that. Hell, considering the day they've had, looking after the kids and all, it makes sense. And not like it's a bad thing that they've laid it out there. ]

[Regardless of where he's been and what he went through, here and now, Amos is an adult. That means it's their responsibility to look after their younger and lesser experienced peers, and Gen fits that to a T. Ciel isn't fussy about her means either, she simply lives by the certainty that if she can recognize a problem, then she'll take whatever means necessary to address it. This is simply her best recourse as far as Gen is concerned, that's all.]

Yes, that's okay. If he sees you positively, then that should already place you in a good position. It's only natural to care and worry about someone close to you. [She nods, shedding aside any prior hints of uncertainty to the neutral calm she habitually sports.] Thank you, Amos.

[...]

Finding out you're on good terms with Minegishi a stroke of fortune, I don't know everyone he gets along with. [(Few as they may be.) She may be prone to stalking, but not to THAT degree.] I spoke with you because I wanted to check up on you, that the Innocence's influence could affect anyone and only be repelled by hurting and upsetting the afflicted is... self-explanatory enough.

[She glances back his way.]

I doubt this is the last time this world finds some way to influence us like that. Do you know what to do, if it happens again?

[ Hell, Amos certainly doesn't have to be told twice to look after their fellow Kenoma who aren't quite as versed in matters like he and Ciel are. It's already baked into his nature. He can just also remember being about Gen's age, already pretty much left to fend for himself, and if the kid wants boundaries, he's inclined to let him have them, since that's what he'd had.

But he'd also tear apart anyone who tried to hurt him, so there's that. So, ] Sure thing. [ She really doesn't need to thank him for something he'd be doing anyways. ] We get along alright. Think that's kind of a new thing for him, but once he realized I wasn't the kind of guy who'd be pushed away...

[ He shrugs, letting the sentence trail off. Sticks and stones, and all that, and if all Gen's got are words, then yeah, those are pretty useless against Amos.

It's easier to talk about that than Innocence. He falls into a contemplative silence, staring down at the cookie tin in his hands. ]

Misa knows how to get me out of it. Matt, too. I told them to do it if it happens to me again. [ He looks back up, then, back at Ciel. ] If I survived it once then I can survive it again, right? So it'll be fine.

[ He pauses. Taps the tin's lid in mild agitation. ]

Would help if we could kill whatever the fuck it was.

[Knowing what she does of Amos so far, it's rather expected that he'd put himself out there to protect the lesser experienced of their bunch. Gen is just... Gen, and while his personal feud with Dokja is the most alarming thing about them presently, that's also the sort of detail Ciel isn't "snitch" enough to tell everyone else. Amos will keep an eye on the teen, he's been made more aware of the need by a peer. That's... all, and hopefully, it'll be enough.

So she nods, moving on.]

That's good. [He has a failsafe, she won't pry further.] I did speak to a few others about that entity. [A small pause, and her eyes fall back on him.] The Regent, too: they're also looking to action upon the Innocence. Will you help us, whatever that may need to be done?

[A foregone conclusion, perhaps, but asking is only polite. She did agree with Silco that Amos was among the most straightforward and best candidates to onboard, once they have a more solid plan in their grasp.]

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baltimores - 2022-07-20 05:34 (UTC) - Expand

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expiera - 2022-07-28 07:24 (UTC) - Expand

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