inutilis: (✞ idle hands.)
father USELESS. ([personal profile] inutilis) wrote in [community profile] aionlogs 2022-08-03 11:21 pm (UTC)

[ this is... a lot. a lot to absorb, and a lot more than Abel anticipated this question to unlock between them.

but he's glad that it has.

...maybe it's ironic, in a way. ironic that of all those here in Horos, this sort of subject might be broached between the two of them; Martyrs both, and those from worlds so very, very different at their base. to have common ground in the most unusual of ways... and on such an unhappy subject? what are the chances?

but Abel is not some reborn, prophetic pawn of his world. the well had not been poisoned before his birth. he is not compelled into using any 'gifts' he was given. there are differences, important distinctions to be made. he would not say he's able to understand the unique situation Rand has shouldered, nor what it feels like. all he can do is try to relate in some small way, even if Abel comes up lacking.

...in the end, he inevitably sets aside his half-eaten pastry, finding he doesn't have much of an appetite for it after all - and fixes Rand with a quietly apologetic, soft look instead. ]


I don't know that there's anything I could say that might... help, with this. Sorting through it is something you'll have to do yourself, Rand, because... just as you're the only one who can choose where you head from here, you're the only one who understands what it is to be where you are. Who you are.

[ and even if Abel might perpetually lament that this boy has been made to bear such a burden, he cannot take it from him. all he can do is stand by his side along the way, see him as far as he can go. drag him, if it comes to that. ]

...But for whatever it's worth, in my experience--

[ grief... and guilt, old. there is a dulled, muffled sensation of it trickling through their shared Legacy, through an empathy neither of them asked for. ]

The more you close yourself off from the things that anchor you to your humanity... the more you endanger the very things you seek to protect. Those connections, those... beautiful things that make your life worth living, that make the pain worth bearing-- those are the things that can save you, even from yourself. It may not mean much coming from me, but... I hope you'll keep it in the back of your mind.

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