aionlogs | [open & closed]

You know, strangely enough... I'm not feeling terribly picky about much of anything, actually...

[ it comes alongside a soft huff that might be the start of a chuckle. perhaps it sounds humble, but it's the God's honest truth; he is so intensely relieved that both he and Himeka have made their way free of that hellhole that Rand could do whatever he saw fit with Abel right about now, and he'd smile happily through all of it. ]

...But I bet you could use a break from carrying dead weight around for-- ah. God, I don't want to know how long it's been you've been hauling me about, do I? Rand, you really ought to take it easy after this, okay...? Are your arms going to fall off? Should I be concerned...?!

[ this time he does scoff, shaking his head. ]

Did I ever tell you about the time one of our sheep fell into a ditch? It was raining so hard I couldn't see in front of my face. Perrin and I had to work together to get her out, and the wool was so waterlogged she felt like twice her real weight. If I could carry her uphill without falling on my face then, I can carry you now.

[ there's a nearer memory, of course. a dark, dark night of stumbling through the woods with his father slung across his back and murmuring deliriously about a fateful day on the slopes of dragonmount. ]

...Sometimes it's hard to remember you were a humble village lad, once upon a time.

[ Abel says it with a note of fondness carried behind the words, even if there is an underlying note of something rueful. (how much Abel would like to see Rand delivered back to such a peaceful, mundane life. what he would give to see it through. God, what he would give.) ]

This is a very endearing mental image, though-- so thank you for that! Am I the waterlogged sheep in this comparison~? I've been called far worse, so I'll take it as a compliment...! Abel was a shepherd, too maybe there's layers to this...

[ there's a staircase that winds around the massive tree trunk that he ascends now. low-hanging boughs and vines above them are still heavy with green leaves and late-blooming flowers, both of which gently brush their heads as he climbs.

and a part of him wonders, with a pang in his chest, when did he become a humble village lad, past tense and once upon a time? there's a part of him that wants to say that never changed. there's the part of him that knows he'd fought in a battle not even a matter of hours ago, bent earth and fire and the very sky to his will. he's looked upon more than one entity of unknowable power and spoken defiance. the stuff of fantastical stories, he would've once said. ]

The sheep bleated more than you have, [ is, maybe, sort of a compliment...? the comparison isn't not a compliment, probably. the ewe had produced a fine lot of wool come shearing day. and, of course, the reference is lost on him. so he frowns, saying, ] You were never a shepherd.

[ this is not a question. he knows more than he's known anything in his whole life that this man has never been within three feet of a sheep. ]

--how would you know? I very well could've been...

[ okay he totally hadn't been a shepherd in any life, it's true, but Rand doesn't have to know that!! and does Abel realize that his reference had gone over the other man's head...? probably not. he might connect the dots later, but for now... suppose it's not important in the grand scheme of things. ]

I'd make a very cute sheep, for the record. Cute, and... fuzzy, and... not the sort you make lamb chop out of, you know.

[ what on earth is he saying--? God only knows, but suppose one can forgive him some manner of delirium. even if it's not delirium at all and most likely simply the normal brand of idiocy; it all comes out in the wash one way or another. ]

Hey, Rand...?

You couldn't have.

[ it's

ridiculous. abel's protests, and the follow-up rambling, of course. but it's ridiculous what a comfort listening to abel is. he hadn't realized how much he missed this, or maybe he didn't let himself realize that. falling apart (or risking it) wouldn't have done abel or himeka any good, would it? it wouldn't have helped them. so he'd distanced himself from his own grief, as he's been doing for months, and it'd become a hard knot of misery roosting in his chest. he'd gotten so used to it he'd stopped noticing it...until now, as it starts to slowly unravel, be soothed by his friend's presence. and given the connection through their legacy, the feeling may well be palpable.

he makes it to the top of the stairs, and they're very close now. there's a steam in the air distinct from the usual mists, some sounds of water. soon, they'll be approaching a space roofed by a canopy, dividers separating off private areas for bathing. ]

Hm?

Edited 2022-08-30 01:08 (UTC)

You've become... quite strong, haven't you?

[ it sounds almost as if it leaves him like an afterthought, as if he's merely mumbling his mind aloud rather than anything he means to convey to Rand.

but the purposefulness behind it becomes evident as he continues on, soft as it is. ]

Maybe you aren't the farm boy anymore, much as I think both of us wish you could be. You're quite cute with sheep, I'm willing to bet... But...

[ the swell of his chest at Rand's back becomes a sigh; not melancholy or rueful or bittersweet, but... proud, and fond. ]

You're not who fate had been out to make you to be, either. And, I think... whoever you're becoming-- I'm glad to know him.

[ protect, or destroy...

it seems Rand made his choice, didn't he?

...Abel really and truly is-- glad. ]

[ he keeps walking as they talk, of course, as he's been doing. after the tangent into sheep and the like, he doesn't expect anything too deep out of this conversation. and how could he, really; abel has to be exhausted, is sure to fall fast asleep after these minor ministrations. and truthfully, not that rand particularly wants to be truthful on this point, he's tired too. as the rush of adrenaline from everything that happened in achamoth (light, even being in achamoth, an old fear) fades, he's increasingly reliant on the Power to keep himself upright.

here's a secret: he has not, as of yet, let go of saidin. this is the longest he's gone with the Power blazing through his veins, and maybe he should be more concerned about that...but it's good to know that he can. once he puts abel down, he promises himself. once the other man is settled. not yet. before, it'd been: once we get to greentruth. but soon, really.

and it's hard to worry about that at all as abel keeps talking. as it becomes clear what he's saying. he swallows, hard, for all the good it does with keeping his composure. he should be happy to hear a sentiment like that, but his first feeling is guilt. he's done things he isn't proud of — that abel wouldn't be proud of — to make it to the pyres in time. he'd known, on some level, for days and weeks that he would. he doesn't deserve this sentiment.

(he's aware, also on some level, that deserve doesn't seem to factor much into things with this man; least of all his own self-perceptions of what he ought to be given.)

but even as unearned as it seems, he can't help the bloom of warmth in his chest either. what high praise this is, and from someone whose opinion he values so much. more than he'd realized, before more recent happenings. imagine knowing this much about his awful fate, his awful past, his failures, and still... ]

I really am going to drop you if you keep doing that.

[ which is less a threat than a warning, emotion heavy as it is in his voice and his heart. he can't cry and carry you at the same time, abel!!! ]

Edited 2022-08-30 16:29 (UTC)

[ the complicated wash of emotions filtering through the bond of their shared Legacy is a gently confusing one; perhaps it works to Rand's advantage that Abel isn't of his full mental acuity, can't examine each with his usual sharp eye. as it stands... it is the warmth that he lets wash over him, making the drowsy smile at his lips all the more sincere. ]

If you drop me, I'll scream.

[ it sounds like he just said "you're the best" or "I'm so glad we're friends" instead of a childish, petty threat, but he sure did threaten to scream like a toddler, huh. guess they both know he's full of it. (probably.)

but he'll relent in divulging unnecessary amounts of Feelings - at least for the moment, not wanting to make this task any more arduous than it already is. ]

...Do you need to wash up, too, Rand? You've, ah... you've been through quite a lot today, haven't you?

[ he huffs out a faintly amused breath. ]

No promises.

[ which can't fool anyone, of course, and he isn't trying to. as if he isn't still fulfilling a promise (you're safe now). and as if he hasn't carried this man without the slightest impulse to let go for who knows how long now, through much more danger than a quiet wood.

he hears the tone, of course. the real meaning. but couching it like this makes it easier for him to pull himself together.

they make it at last to a partitioned off area, complete with some seating and an empty tub. as rand makes for the chairs, moving to slowly crouch so abel can slide onto one, he says, ]

I'm fine, [ which must be the most predictable answer imaginable, and, ] Besides, I thought you liked how I smelled.

[ hilarious!!! because, more importantly, ]

Can you wait here while I fetch the water?

[ he's obediently loosening his hold on Rand, doing the best he can to make depositing him in the chair an easy task - even if it's a bit more difficult than it should be for how he's a bit jelly, but he gets there.

...poor Rand has got to be stiff as can be after carrying a grown man of Abel's stature for as long as he has; the priest is genuinely grateful, even if he might not be able to do much to alleviate the burden the boy is carrying as he nods his head in quick assent. the least he can do is assuage any lingering worries, ]

--I'm fine! I'm fine, so don't rush yourself, alright?

[ believe it or not, slouched over in this chair a mess - Abel is the best he's been in weeks, and though he's aching for sleep - he will gladly hold through bath time.

....long as there's a rubber ducky involved, somewhere. mm, naturally. ]

[ difficulty means little to him, besides not wanting to hurt abel any more than he already has been. that's the part he's really worried about. but — they manage, and he straightens. he can't help rolling his shoulders as he turns, but that's the only note of complaint he'll allow in front of his friend.

because...whatever abel says, he's in worse condition. he's been through far more. the fact that he likely is better now than he's been in weeks is as much an awful truth as any kind of reassurance. just looking at the man is a fresh reminder of this; rand had seen him at the pyres, of course, but with abel on his back he hadn't really had much cause to look at the state he's in. it's painful every time.

but he says, ]

I won't be long.

[ and he isn't. there's a source of water nearby, so it's just a matter of making a couple of trips to fill a bucket and dump out water in the tub. extremely tragically, he has no idea what a rubber ducky is. but he does find a cake of soap that gets set on the rim of the tub during one trip, so that's....something? ]

[ he knows he must look a disaster as he slumps in the chair and waits for Rand's return; Abel cannot help but feel a bit silly, a bit useless for it, left unable to do more than sit here while his companion repeatedly goes about filling the tub for him - but he knows he should simply be grateful and take this for what it is. Rand is going out of his way to help him, above and beyond, even - and though it's difficult to swallow so much kindness, he wouldn't dream of protesting.

there's soap, and water, and a tub, and this place is warm and tranquil and nothing like the tiny little cell he had Himeka had shared for so long, reeking of blood and sweat and misery.

it's perfect.

and soon as it looks like preparations are complete, Abel's rubbing one of his wrists a tad absently; they're red-rimmed and bear ugly markings from pulling against shackles he's free of, now. it's surreal, honestly - sitting here as if he hadn't been in the heart of Achamoth an hour ago. surreal, and... ]

...Ah, I'm not sure there's enough soap in the world for this--

[ he's dropping his fingers away with a smile that's more self-deprecating this time around. what a mess... what a mess they'd wrought on the Pleroma. ]

I'll have time for lots of baths after this one, though! A good long soak, one of these days. --Doesn't that sound nice...?

[ it'll be alright. ...it's alright. one thing at a time. ]

[ honestly, it's — good to feel useful. some nice, honest work takes the edge off weeks of gnawing helplessness. it's just drawing a bath, but it's something tangible to offer. he, and the rest of them, couldn't make it to achamoth any sooner. he has no talent for healing. but this is something, at least.

fussing about with the bath while abel rests means that he can dip his fingers in the water and give them a little swirl, raising the temperature to something warm and comfortable and gently steaming. he might even go unseen as he does.

and when the preparations are about ready, he can't help the way his eyes are drawn to abel's wrists by that absent motion, or how he winces. light, but that looks so painful. another pulse of guilt he swallows down, because later, later, later. ]

A good long soak every day, if you like. As many times as you want.

[ an offer that comes softly, but earnestly, as he goes to help abel up and over to the tub. ]

[ all too happy to go with Rand's assistance, he's leaning a tad awkwardly into his friend's weight - just a little unsteady, but able to hold himself aloft. Abel's keeping hold of Rand as he takes a step into the water, and...

--it burns, aches, but it's a remarkably good sort of pain. the water is already turning colors; Abel doesn't want to think about it all too much. he'll be rid of it all, soon. and then there will be bed, God, blessed bed-- ]

Alright. ...Alright; I'm going to take this horrid thing off and we are to burn it, later. Hear me? Just, um... don't look, f-for a second.

[ the ragged and rather abused gown, he means; he needs to remove it. to, you know.

get nakey, w-wow, close your eyes...!! ]

I hear you.

[ hell, he's happy to help with burning the thing later if that'd help abel feel better, process everything that's happened. as it is, he just closes his eyes dutifully at the request and stays near to provide any needed support. it'd be incredibly stupid (and, you know, distressing) for abel to have a fall while getting bathed after they've safely gotten him out of a battle.

he really should clean up, he considers as he waits. he was always going to take a bath of his own after abel was taken care of, back at ernesto's, and he still will. but: imagine going through the trouble of helping the priest take a warm bath only to offer up a sooty or bloody arm for him to lean on right afterwards. he can make quick use of a wet towel, at least, maybe a clean shirt for himself when he goes to grab clothes. he doesn't like the idea of leaving abel alone right now, but that's a necessary task anyway, and one that can be done without taking too long. ]

I'll bring you something else to wear, [ said while they're on the subject, while he's thinking about it, ] after you sit.

[ h... haha; he's such a-- a good kid, Rand.

Abel's a bit surprised to see him hover - but it makes sense; suppose Abel is a bit more wobbly on his feet than must be comforting, and he won't refute it's comforting to have his friend nearby just in case he should fall on his ass in a familiarly clumsy fashion. but now isn't the time for those kinds of games, and he's peeling the filthy gown up and over his head with a mild wince for the stretching of wounds and bruises--

...but it isn't long before he's carefully lowered himself down into the water, sunken all the way down to his chin. it stings, at first-- but God, it is wonderful despite it, and he can't help the involuntary exhale of genuine relief. ]

I... think I live here, now.

[ y-you can peek, now, Rand, if you want - and go get cleaned up yourself, would you? ]

[ he takes that as leave to open his eyes ~~not peek that's weird that is his faTHER???~~ and smile. ]

You could if you want.

[ he seems to keep saying that. maybe he just can't help himself with these reminders: you're free now, you're free now. and after a brief pause, sure that abel seems comfortable, he says, ]

I won't be long.

[ and, slowly, he leaves abel to a little peace and quiet. there are quarters he's used on and off in greentruth and he finds them now, fishes out a fresh shirt and a towel, lays them aside. and then...he finally sits at the edge of the bed, closes his eyes, and makes himself let go of the Power. every bit of pain that the Power kept at bay, every bit of exhaustion from fight after fight after fight and from the immense energy he drew from the True Source — all of it crashes down on him at once.

he gives himself a white-knuckled count of ten before making himself get back up.

when he returns some small time later, he is cleaner, changed into new clothes, and carrying something fresh for abel as well. there's a little flutter of relief when he sees the man still hopefully enjoying himself in the tub — though where he would go is hard to say — and a real smile, as he goes to set himself down in the seat abel had used earlier.

though he can't help asking, almost as soon as he sits, ]

Is the water still warm?

[ oh, he can just imagine the tone mat would take with him now. sorry, when did you become my mum? or the like. ]

[open & closed]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject