EVENT #1: THE EMPTY THRONE

[aionmods]

The Empty Throne

DESCENT

Nearly two weeks after being dragged from shrine caverns, you hear along the grapevine that the "the throne room is complete." It doesn't take long to figure out what that means; the ritual grounds that you have been hearing mention of are finally prepared, and it's only a short while before you are once again being gathered together for travel. As a small mercy, at least this time the journey is short.

Through a passage that has been blocked by a gathering of soldiers for the entire length of your stay, a stairway is revealed to you. It leads deep into the ruins, through unfamiliar structures and into the bowels of the earth. Though your feel your are mostly going downward, the walk is still long on account of how many stairs their are, and the soldiers escorting you are restless. They are now being led by the stray, mask wearing Achamites that have been accompanying the group till now, silently observing. Whatever place this is, it seems that they now hold court.

Funneled into the chambers below, you are greeted by a massive, domed enclosure of stone. Positioned around its circular radius are twelve thrones in various states of disrepair, sized as if meant to seat giants. The backs of these thrones all differ slightly in design, though most have great cleaves of stone broken loose from their architecture, as if subjected to some great cataclysm. Each is engraved with a sigil, though some have been obscured by the destruction wrought. The throne closest to the entrance has been almost entirely demolished, making it impossible to glean much about.

The dome's ceiling appears to be hundreds of feet tall at its apex, its smooth surface disrupted by stalactites that puncture through its form like teeth. As a result, many chunks of the original structure seem to have cracked and collapsed in to the floor below. When examined closely, these fragments of the domed ceiling seem to be made of a material strangely reflective in quality, though caked in many years of dirt and grime. If large enough sections are cleaned, patterns may emerge, revealing designs that look almost like star maps. The floor beneath your feet as a similar, but subtly different quality, covered in wreckage and ruin but can be cleaned to reveal complex patterns of intersecting lines.

A careful eye will indicate that these lines all lead towards the center of the room - the one space that has been cleared and scrubbed prior to your arrival. Here, the lines converge, with carefully preserved marking in the stone that bely increasing levels of runic complexity the closer you look. This is where the ritual will be held, you are told.

THE RITUAL

There is not much time to regain your bearings before you are being shuffled forth towards the ritual space; no, all the waiting has already been done. Under the command of the smaller group of Achamites, the Hylicians will make heavy use of the whips in leading everyone to their places along the rune-inscribed circle. Before that, however, small cuts will be made to each prisoner with an athame, either on their hand or arm. With a sharp, burning sensation in the afflicted skin, these cuts will spread into wounds reflecting the image of one of the eleven sigils displayed on the thrones encircling the group, and matching the shrine they were originally pulled from.

With this accomplished, they can finally be taken into the circle. With a design comprised of four triangles overlapping, the design of an open eye carved at its center, all prisoners will be led to separates points on its design where the lines cross. Seemingly arranged by their shrine sigil to be closest to whatever throne represents them, they will be brought to their designated positions one by one. Any attempts to flee or disrupt the process will be dealt with swiftly and harshly, exacerbated by the increasing levels of paranoia and fear in the soldiers themselves. Whatever is being done here, they don't seem happy to involved with it either.

When everyone is in place, the seeming master of ceremonies will finally emerge. A dark haired woman will appear from the shadows, motes of golden light fluttering about her otherwise darkness-clad visage. Moving towards the center of the circle, she will stand over the marking of the eye and begin working her magicks. As if on cue, the soldiers will withdraw any remaining whips and scurry to the outside of the circle, only for new bonds of ethereal energy to lash out of the ritual circle itself, binding each and every prisoner and dragging them down to their knees. Among the soldiers, you can hear mutterings identifying this woman as "the Aion."

"Come," she says to the coterie of robed Achamites, who will approach the circle with an assortment of vials collected into cases. There is enough for each prisoner to be given a drink, and so they will; a vial of abyssal liquid will be forced into each one of your throats, no matter how uncomfortably it must be done. While no less ruthless, the Achamites have a different way about them as they work, forcing themselves upon you with a strange familiarity that feels more akin to a mother forcing their child to take medicine than the suspicious hostility of the soldiers. As the foul liquid touches your tongue, it takes on a consistency almost like a living thing, crawling down your throat even if you refuse to swallow, all while the Achamites stroke your hair and make saccharine assurances.

Once all the prisoners have been fed their vial, the Achamamites too will retreat from the circle - all except for one. Joining 'the Aion' at the center, the two of them will begin enacting a planned ceremony of sorts, that culminates in the following scene:

The Achamite kneels before the Aion, lifting their masked face to meet their dark gaze. They speak, in practiced tones.

"To the Kenoma my body, to the Kenoma my soul."

In response, the Aion holds the Achamite's face between their hands in almost a loving gesture. She speaks softly:

"By the blood of the Martyr, I accept your sacrifice."

From the Aion's hands a darkness spreads across the Achamite's body, as if they are melting and dissolving on a cellular level. She kneels along with them, cradling them as their body breaks down, pooling in a void-black liquid around their knees. It drains into the lines of the ritual circle, surging out towards the prisoners.

Within moments, the ritual is complete.

KENOMA SICKNESS

As this dark power surges throughout the ritual circle, you will find yourself almost consumed by the tide. Whatever foul creation you were forced to swallow wakes within your chest, and you can feel it move within your veins, inside you lungs, behind your eyes. As quickly as it begins, the flood of darkness washes over you, but not without leaving you stained.

Something has changed in its wake. As you return to your senses, you will notice the magical bonds of the circle have fallen away, leaving you free to move; for once, the soldiers will not move to lead or restrain you. Instead, the Hylicians warily back away from the ritual space, retreating towards the only path upwards, where they form a defensive line. The Achamites that linger make a series of ritual gestures, praying in voices too soft to hear. The Aion woman stands in the center, her hands blackened with residue from the person you just watched fall to pieces in her arms.

"You will be given time to find your truth," she says. "Use it well."

As you recover from the experience enough to stand, she and her Achamite entourage are already retreating to join the Hylician guard. Gradually, your situation will become clear: they intend to keep your trapped down here. However, it will not be the same as when you waited before. Instead, the soldiers simply intend to block your only exit out, and otherwise leave you free to roam the full diameter of the throne room, seemingly free to do whatever you want as long as it isn't trying to break free of the cavern's confines. Each day, they will offer to their prisoners a limit supply of food, water, and firewood, but nothing more. Beyond that, you only have your increasingly dirty white robes and the same bedrolls as before.

❖ COMMUNION
The first change you will experience is an itching darkness in your mind, like a psychic wound that is becoming infected. The sort of thoughts you would normally try to force down become increasingly hard to resist; despair, hatred, and fear will plague you, and requiring great feats of will to silence even temporarily. Phantoms of the things you'd rather forget will become a constant companion, all while a presence seems to whisper: when you accept your fate, the pain will stop.

Worse than this, the darkness of your mind may not remain private. As if awakened by the ritual, your empathetic sense has become impossibly strong, to the point that you feel the broadcasted emotions and thoughts of others, and in turn, your darkest thoughts will be psychically projected to others with a volume proportional to the intensity with which you feel them. This effect is most potent between those sharing Legacy, with the capacity for their identities to become momentarily confused. In all cases, this connection may bleed into your dreams, or manifest as hallucinations.

❖ TRANSFORMATION
Yet, your mind is not the only thing that ails. In proportion to the strength of your emotions, your body may begin changing to match your state of mind. Physical transformations akin to those mentioned here will begin to manifest, themed to your inner suffering and the most negative aspects of your self conception. These alterations may shift from moment to moment, depending on the turbulence of your emotional state. They may or may not be painful.

❖ AFFLICTION
Along with the above effects, characters may also experience various more mundane ailments; essentially anything traditionally associated with illness could fit. Weakness, nausea, body aches, and chills are all common options. Along with this, void-black ooze may start to trickle from virtually any orifice. While it may stain clothing and skin, the material itself will dissipate after a few minutes in a manner reminiscent of ectoplasm. This effect may also appear around your Shard, as if the stone itself has begun to bleed.

RESISTANCE

Even as the Kenoma threatens to overwhelm you, you still have the power to fight. Though it may be a grueling war of attrition, you can force back its advances with sufficient will to survive and resist the darkness. Of course, your captors are not going to make this easy for you. Those that fight hard enough to expel the Kenoma from their bodies and spirits will take at least a week to do so, and for that duration they will be trapped within this chilly cavern, haunted by their worst thoughts and emotions.

The bedrolls barely strand up against the cold, your clothing doesn't at all, and to be comfortable you'll require fire. Yet, there is a limited amount provided to you, along with food and water, and the soldiers do not seem to be making any effort to distribute it evenly. Achieving basic warmth and sustenance may become a battle against your fellow inmates, all while you struggle against the enemy infecting your body. Cracks in the dome of the cavern lead into some smaller caverns and crevasses in the stone that can offer some privacy or protection, but the more splintered the group becomes the less the supplies will hold up. Fortunately for you, neither the cold nor starvation will kill you, but it will make you suffer.

Yet, you may still persevere. As you fight back the Kenoma, something else will be cultivated in its place. Bit by bit, a comforting and warm presence will grow within you, gradually disrupting the maladies afflicting your body and mind. Your faith and perseverance has been rewarded with an attunement to the Pleroma, the Kenoma's cosmological opposite; given enough time, the Kenoma will be forced from your being entirely, in the form of void-black sludge. Only then will your power begin to shine through, the abilities of your past life slowly returning.

You must keep your guard. With or without otherworldly power, escape will be a struggle.

ACCEPTANCE

Or, you may choose the easy option. Maybe the Kenoma resonates with your history and emotions in a way that makes it seem like it isn't the enemy. Maybe the depths of your despair are too deep to escape. Maybe your simply lack the strength to fight. Whatever the reason, sooner or later, the Kenoma claims you. The more you let it in, the less it feels like a poison and the more it feels like strength. The darkness settles comfortably into the cracks and holes of your spirit, and you awaken to its power. You feel the change viscerally.

This world is not good enough, a voice seems to speak through the Kenoma. This suffering you feel, the cruelty that has birthed this darkness in you... it is simply the rot that is consuming this existence. A better universe awaits, one forged by your own hand, and all you need do is first bring about this broken reality's end.

Whatever effects you were suffering from the Kenoma's presence will fade away, and in its place, you will feel your endurance bolstered. The clarity is stark in comparison to the mire you were trapped in before. As the other prisoners suffer around you, the Aion woman from before and an accompaniment of a couple Hylician soldiers will approach you among the ruins, as if summoned straight to your location. She looks you over, her dark eyes impassive, and then asks:

"Did you feel it?"

She doesn't actually wait for an answer, your expression alone enough to assure her. She'll tell the soldiers that you are free to go, and that you are to be given a share of their food and a change of clothes. She'll escort you out of cavern and towards the upper ruins, where the soldiers and Achamites have set up camp. This feels natural to you, somehow, like you and her are on the same wavelength in a way that is hard to comprehend. She is like you, you sense. That dark power is within her as well.

She doesn't linger with you for long, but she will see that you are on your way before heading back to the caverns. She'll say that the voice you heard, that promise, was the Regent, the ruler of this land. They spoke of a power that could birth a new, better universe, and they weren't misleading you. It's within their reach, closer than ever, and if you help them achieve it you will be rewarded lavishly. For now, you are free to regain your strength while the others make their choices. She only asks that you stay in the area and be ready to join the Regent in Achamoth when all is prepared.

If you're prone to boredom, though, she will mention that you'd really be doing the prisoners a favor by convincing them to accept the Kenoma like you did. You could convince them with words, or by making their situations so unbearable they won't have a choice but to break. However you'd like. It won't be worse than what's coming for them if they carry on this way.

When she parts ways with you, you are left to your own devices. Somehow, you feel inclined to cooperate. After all, the Regent did have a point.

QUESTIONS

Are the involuntary transformations during the Kenoma sickness period temporary afflictions or permanent ones?
By default they are temporary, but characters can also keep a couple keepsake changes if you'd like! An Aion's physical appearance is something that is generally in flux, and so even if you keep something from this event, you can always alter it later.

What kind of supplies are going to be distributed to those who accept Kenoma and leave the caverns?
They'll be given food, water, and clothing. They'll be given more/better rations than they were as prisoners, but it's still the sort of food that is limited by the fact that they are out here on a mission. The soldiers will have some fresh meat from prey they've been hunting in the forest, and will generally be having a lot of stew-based food going. There are actual spices in it, though, so that's cool. This is all set up where the Hylicians are camping.

As for clothes, they will get a fresh set (including boots or shoes) and some soap to clean themselves up in the nearby creeks and ponds. Hylici has an aesthetic that leans towards ancient Greek/Roman, so while they won't have anything fancy with them, you are free to assume they are able to acquire anything in that general ballpark. They do also have pants, though. While it is now spring and Horos has a generally temperate climate, it can be chilly at night.

Will Pleroma attuned be able to escape once they've regained their powers?
Yes, they will be allowed to escape at that point, and a second log will be going up to cover that part of the event. This log should generally cover up until shortly after Pleroma start ejecting the Kenoma's influence. Characters are permitted to escape by their own power if they somehow devise a plan to do so, but as we know the Pleromas are at a significant disadvantage in this situation, some characters who have fought against the Kenoma particularly valiantly will be given some magical assistance to help the survivors escape.

Will the Kenomas be able to try to stop them?
Yes! The second log will be set up to contain some PVP, though given the Pleromas do need to escape, we ask that you play nice. There will be a battle, but it will be structured in the context of the Pleromas having to hold off the Kenomas long enough to escape, so it will be relatively brief.

Can we speak to "the Aion"?
Yes, she will be around for the full length of the event. All characters will have the chance to find her watching over the group whether they are Kenomas or soon to be Pleromas. She will not be that talkative, though, so anyone tagging her will have to lead the conversation. She will not make small talk. Martyrs will recognize her as one of them.

Comments

[baltimores]

[ Amos stares.

Truth is, he doesn't really care if others give in or not. If they want to prolong whatever this is, then that's their business. All he can do is offer some kind of reassurance that it'll be okay to remove themselves from this hell. Better than okay, really.

So he genuinely doesn't know what to do with Ernesto's answer. Even with the amusement layered in, it's unfathomable to him. It truly makes no sense. ]

How? [ It isn't that he disbelieves him; Amos just cannot consider how anyone could find peace of mind in the midst of... this. It had broken him relatively quick, taken him back to places he'd thought he'd permanently left behind. All he'd wanted was to leave. So he had. ] When you accept it, sure. How do you find peace of mind fighting it?

[goldendeceiver]

[ Maybe it's because Ernesto has never truly left his past behind, even if he doesn't talk about it much. The things he's seen and experienced, both the good and the horrible, play in constant loops inside of his mind even without some kind of sentient tar wiggling around inside of his stomach. There's never really a reprieve from this in a way.

But he can at least make choices on occasion that soothe those thoughts for a bit. He's not pretending he has a perfect grasp of right or wrong, but on a rare occasion he feels pretty confident he knows what he's supposed to do.

If he can just hold on long enough to do it. ]

I'm not sure I could explain it in a way that makes any sense to you.

[ Not without divulging more about himself than he's willing to. ]

But accepting it would bring its own sort of discomfort for me personally.

[ It probably wouldn't. That little shift in perspective would be strong enough to eliminate that for Ernesto, but he doesn't know that. He hasn't accepted the Kenoma, after all. ]

[baltimores]

[ Funnily enough, that simple explanation makes complete sense to Amos.

He gets it, that reluctance to elaborate. He feels the same way. It's part of what had driven him to accept it. Not a big part, but still a part, once he'd come to some faint realization that everything he was feeling, others could feel, too. The ultimate goal had been eliminating it for himself; keeping it to himself played its own small role.

It takes a moment before understanding makes itself known in his expression, about the same time he feels something in his gut drop. He still feels good about what he did. He doesn't regret it. But Ernesto's planted this seed of doubt in his mind that, left to his own instincts, Amos fucked up.

It doesn't surprise him. He just sighs as he shifts from a crouch to sit down properly. He needs that, in this moment. Sturdier ground underneath him. An easier way to rest, if you can call being down here resting — which you really can't, but he'd accepted it. So he's fine. ]

Guess it all comes down to what we can live with doing. [ And he looks back at Ernesto with what could be envy, is probably closer to resignation. ] Back home, I tried. Didn't always succeed, but I tried. Except I guess this was inevitable for me. And, I dunno, it doesn't feel all that bad. I can live with it. But I used to know people who probably couldn't. If you're like them, that's probably a good thing.

[ He looks at the way Ernesto is definitely having a rougher go of it than him now, though. Looks uncomfortable either way. Amos shrugs a shoulder. ]

I don't think this is a bad thing though. Just kinda is.

[ He's not going to try to badger Ernesto into accepting he doesn't want. He has more than enough respect for people to make their own choices. Just, if Ernesto did decide he didn't want this anymore... it'd be okay.

A beat. ]

Name's Amos.

[goldendeceiver]

[ It would be nice to think that people wouldn't judge him for making that choice to let go and give into it all; Ernesto certainly doesn't judge others for taking this path. The funny thing is though, he doesn't think he could offer himself that same leeway. At the very least in the midst of his suffering, he thinks he'd always live with that regret if he picked that route now.

So he does what he did in the strange dream he had before arriving in this world, he refuses to pick a path. He's planted himself firmly at a miserable crossroads, and seems to be doing just fine writhing around in pain here for now.

You just need to have a very loose definition of just fine.

His ears perk up a little as Amos takes a seat. The man might not realize it, but he's offering Ernesto the one thing that brings him any kind of relief during all of this: a distraction. Conversations and someone else to focus on have allowed him to hold some of the feelings at bay for a moment. Ernesto is the type to look both inward and outward pretty frequently, but he's always found the second a lot more pleasant of an experience. ]

Ernesto. I'd say it's nice to meet you right now, Amos, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit I wished it was other almost any other circumstances.

[ His voice sounds a little strained as he says all of that, but he seems willing to carry on this conversation. There's at least nothing derisive or disingenuous in his tone as he talks. ]

I'm glad at least one of us had a chance for some reprieve from this though.

[baltimores]

[ Judging by the way Ernesto's ears perk up, Amos figures he must be doing something right. Any sign of life is a good one when you're stuck down here, right? And, really — the Martyr had suggested that convincing others to accept it, to give in, would be doing them a favour. But Amos had come back down into the caverns intent on helping people feel better, first and foremost. Sure, the obvious answer to that would be to accept the Kenoma, but there are, apparently, other ways to help. And he's stumbled on one of them.

There's a sharp exhale of what could be considered amusement at the idea of meeting under other circumstances. Yeah, that would definitely be better for all involved, wouldn't it. It's not what they've gotten, though. And they've gotta make their choices within the parameters offered. No getting around that. ]

Yeah. I couldn't go back there. Can't lie, this is much better. [ Not trying to convince Ernesto of anything, but... it's pretty obvious Amos is on the better end of things right now. ] If there was a way to get you out of here without doing something you didn't want to do, think I'd try to help you. But I don't think there is. Kinda down to just the two options.

[ He frowns. It's not exactly a pleasant thought that's just occurred to him, but it's not like these are pleasant circumstances. They can both be honest about that much. ]

I don't even know what the second option is, actually. I dunno if there's any endgame other than accepting it. Nobody's been exactly clear on that front.

[goldendeceiver]

[ The distraction from his suffering is a lot more appreciated than Amos knows. The physical ailments don't go away just from a little chatting, but conversation does wonders in holding the venomous thoughts that have been gnawing away at him at bay for at least a little while.

The smile on his face is gentle at least, and the slow tail wagging that starts up might be some sign of gratitude at least, even if Ernesto doesn't say it in so many words.

Though it might also come across a bit eerie when the smile doesn't waver as he makes a confession about this. ]

There's probably one second option, and I expect if it doesn't happen naturally, then they'll make it happen themselves. There's only so much in the way of time and resources that anyone is going to be willing to waste.

[ At least his tail stops wagging as he admits he expectes he is probably going to die in this dank, miserable place. ]

[baltimores]

[ Yeah, dying isn't exactly a cheery thought, is it. Amos notices the tail more than the smile. He's plenty familiar with plastering expressions he doesn't mean across his face. Isn't sure if that's what Ernesto is doing, but body language tends to be more honest, he's found.

Sure had hit him hard down here earlier. Now he's mostly at ease. He's made his choice; everyone else will make theirs. Except. ]

Kinda wished it would happen naturally. That was my first choice. [ A shrug, eh, what're you gonna do. ] If it takes this long to happen though, then yeah, I wasn't gonna be able to hold out. I don't have what you have.

[ Whatever standards it is Ernesto holds himself to — the ones that are making what could be his last days like this, but bringing him peace of mind at the same time — they're kinda stupid. But they're also honest, and he respects that. Guess he is a little envious, after all. ]

Can't argue with it if it's what you want, though. I mean. Compared to the other option. I still say it's not so bad, but I get it, if you'd rather just die instead. I knew someone like that once. Could be real fucking stupid sometimes, but he was also maybe the best person I ever met.

[goldendeceiver]

[ He might be disappointed to know that in better circumstances that tail is able to lie just as easily as the man it's attached to, but there's something to it right now. Ernesto is too worn down to take the care needed to keep track of every piece of his appearance now. Kind of hard to when he looks like death warmed over these days anyway.

In fact, that tail droops further along with Ernesto's ears at the sentence "I don't have what you have."

That's an absurd notion to him right there, to think that he has anything to him at all. He's not a particularly strong man, and talking so casually about his impending death is just making him feel more miserable.

His laugh in response is pitiful to hear. ]

You say it like I want to die though.

[ There have been moments when the dark thoughts really start to eat at him that it crosses his mind. If his world is really gone, if everyone he knew and loved is gone with it... he really would be a man who had nothing at all then, wouldn't he? He's not sure he could continue to live with the crushing weight of that reality if it is really true.

But then isn't it kind of pathetic that he is still feeling his heart rate pick up slightly as they discuss the fact that his continued rejection of the Kenoma might result in him being killed?

These thoughts play through his head as he lets out a second, even weaker laugh. His head dips forward, hanging low in a way that matches the rest of his haggard appearance.

Shit... ]

[baltimores]

[ The drooping is kinda worrying. Understandable, but not a good sign.

Amos frowns. He lowers his own posture, trying to catch Ernesto's gaze. He's not gonna force it or anything, just... trying to stay on that same level. ]

I mean. If it's the only other option you got. Rock and a hard place is never fun, but if dying's easier then it just is. There's no shame in that. There've been a couple of times I know I would've made that choice.

[ This just. Wasn't one of them, in the end.

But Ernesto does have plenty that Amos doesn't, never will. Convictions; the ability to question himself, even in the throes of all of this. He really hates that he's been put in this position; the more Amos talks to him, the more he figures they would've gotten along great if they could have met any other way. That he might've been someone he would've tried to follow.

Shit, it would've been nice to get to meet him when they were all themselves, before they had to make choices this momentous. Amos doesn't really regret anything — but he does regret that. And.

Soft but plainspoken, ] I'd help you if I could. Just don't think I can. [ A beat. ] I am sorry about that.

[goldendeceiver]

[ Amos isn't forcing anything, but Ernesto is making myself look up again regardless. It's clear that Amos is trying to catch his gaze, and the least he can do is put on the front of still being a functional person, instead of a heap of misery in human skin.

The funny thing is that dying isn't the easier choice at all for him. The easier choice is to let the voices whispering inside his head convince him to let go. In theory it would be easy enough, because Ernesto isn't that hard to sway to new ideas.

Hell, he'd been swayed into testing out some new beliefs not too long before he showed up in this world. He'd kind of wanted to test them out a little more too, but they're in heavy contrast to what the Kenoma seems to be all about. So it seems like one way or another, he's not going to be allowed to do that.

He runs a hand through his hair, pushing his sweat-damp bangs away from his face for a moment as he lets out a long sigh. ]

Not unless you can find a way for me to get this out of my system.

[ Which he doubts, considering nothing he's done so far has worked. ]

[baltimores]

[ He shakes his head. ]

Nah. Once they put it in there it kinda really wants to get in, doesn't it.

[ Amos frowns at the now-phantom sensation of it; it's not like he'd enjoyed it. He still remembers that feeling of it trying to seep into every pore, every crack of his being, like a full-on assault. It... really wasn't pleasant. ]

I know this just sounds like me saying shit, and it doesn't help any, but fighting it this long is kind of amazing. Like... if peace of mind is the number one thing you were after, as much as this sucks right now, I feel like you're gonna at least get that much.

[ And that's just going to have to be enough, isn't it? ]

[goldendeceiver]

[ Ernesto's silent smile in response to that question is tight and not all that happy looking. No, it certainly doesn't seem to want to get out of his system at all. Whether or not he's willing to welcome it or not, it has taken a deep root inside of him.

The smile at least softens as Amos goes on. Ernesto doesn't feel like he's someone that deserves much admiration from others, but it's still kind of nice to hear he's doing a good job regardless. He's been a disappointment to others more often than he's been someone who has earned their respect.

It's also nice to get a reassurance like that, even if it doesn't ease the nervous anticipation he feels about his own fate much. ]

I appreciate the vote of confidence, and I hope you're right about that.

[baltimores]

[ Amos is so used to preparing himself to be a disappointment — it's practically his life's philosophy, try to do everything he can to avoid disappointing people, because just by his inherent nature it's what he's destined to do — that it doesn't even occur to him that the same could be true for anyone else. And definitely not for someone like Ernesto, who's still going at it, who's clearly better than he is.

He nods at him. ]

Me too.

[ And he does mean it. Whether others accept the Kenoma isn't really any of Amos' business. He just wanted to try to let them know that it'd be okay if they did. If they still don't want to, then that's their problem. But after talking with Ernesto about it, about what it might mean for him, it's not like Amos doesn't feel at least a twinge of sympathy for him.

He reaches up to rub the back of his neck, a little embarrassed. ]

Don't think I got anything else for you. [ Still apologetic. ] I can keep sitting with you, if you want. Do whatever. But if you want me to fuck off, I get that too. Your call.

[goldendeceiver]

[ He's an interesting man, that's for sure. Ernesto has to wonder what Mr. Amos here thinks about himself that he's praising Ernesto for doing so little, and seems to find his presence a burden. In this whole mess the only thing that's been any real comfort has been the small bits of human companionship they can maintain between suffering.

So Ernesto shakes his head slightly at that offer to fuck off. ]

I don't mind the company right now.

[ They weren't exactly having a lighthearted chat, but a little shift in the topic, and Ernesto thinks he might be able to take his mind off of the troubling thoughts that have been plaguing him of late. ]

Tell me, Mr. Amos, are they at least treating you all well after you leave this room?

[ Room is such a generous room for the ritual cavern. ]

[baltimores]

[ Amos lifts his head up, sits up a little straighter at the idea that Ernesto doesn't mind him sticking around. There's something... really nice about that. Even if he can't help him in a meaningful way, he's still wanted on some level.

He's gonna remember that.

He can't help the quirk of his lips into something almost like a smile at the question. Answering it's gonna feel kinda like teasing, but Ernesto had asked, so... ]

Yeah. Food's better, they got a kind of stew going on up there. You get to take a bath. And just... rest. It's almost like camping.

[ And then he scrunches his nose a little. ]

The soldiers are still kinda dicks, but they mostly leave us alone. So that's nice.

[goldendeceiver]

[ Considering what Ernesto thinks his eventual fate is to be, he's not thinking long term here. He would be a little relieved to know that he was actively working towards having one less enemy in a future he doesn't yet know exists.

The answer makes him laugh weakly though. Like camping, huh? It's a nice way to look at it after these soldiers tormented all of their camping buddies a little earlier on in the trip. ]

I'm glad for that much at least. I wouldn't expect them to suddenly become friendly with everyone, but it's good they're at least leaving you all be.

[baltimores]

[ Amos is of two minds about that weak laugh — yeah, the laugh in and of itself is kind of nice to hear. Like they really are just shooting the shit. The weak part, though, is a reminder of what's to come. It's a really odd disconnect.

But if Ernesto's still game, then so is Amos. So he acts like all they're doing is shooting the shit. ]

Yeah. You gotta think they want us for something, so picking fights now probably isn't smart. [ He just breezes right through that idea — they were all brought here for something, and who knows what that is, what'll be asked of them. Whatever it is, Amos is already in deep enough that he doesn't mind. ] Honestly, I've had worse babysitters. It's alright.

[goldendeceiver]

[ The weakness is usually something Ernesto wouldn't even let sneak into his voice or tone normally, but things are anything but normal right now. It almost feels frightening to not be able to cover up his emotions as well as he usually does.

So Amos' decision to let him continue with the lie, no matter how unbelievable it is right now, is greatly appreciated.

He'll even manage an impressed whistle at Amos' confession. ]

Sorry to hear this isn't the worst treatment you've had before.

[baltimores]

[ It's just easier to go with the lie someone else has set than to try to examine anything underneath it. If doing that makes things easier for the other party, then it's a win-win, isn't it?

He kinda clicks his tongue at the whistle; a low, almost thoughtful sound. ]

Yeah, well. You know. [ He shrugs. ] Being down here did a good job of putting all that back in my head again.

[ He pauses, takes a second to look in on himself, the feel of the Kenoma increasingly settling in, becoming a complete part of him. The peace it brought. Is continuing to bring, really, as it's reflected in his voice. He may be talking about something horrific, but it's all in the past now, so he really is fine with it, at least on a surface level.

... The surface level being all he's really capable of examining. Aren't coping mechanisms great? ]

That's why I went with it. The stuff they put in us. It was just easier.

[goldendeceiver]

[ Now that's a relatable feeling right there. Though Ernesto has a tendency towards deep self-reflection when left on his own, he's sure as hell not about to open up to any long term effects a troubled past might have foisted upon him. On a surface level he also seems fine.

You know, on the surface.

It's harder to maintain that illusion with the level of stress being applied to him in this cavern though, so he can't blame Amos at all for that answer.

With a small sigh, Ernesto is forced to give a nod of agreement. ]

Probably better to than dragging it all out honestly.

[ He says hypocritically as someone dragging it all out.

It's different if you're going to accept it though. No point in putting yourself through this hell first. ]

[baltimores]

[ This is what Amos doesn't get, what has him convinced that Ernesto is a better person than he'll ever be. Because giving in was better than continuing to hold out. Maybe it was a selfish act; he doesn't really care about selfish, though.

... Which is part of the reason he knows he's a bad person. The fact that Ernesto has done the opposite speaks volumes.

Hell of a time and place to meet someone like him. ]

Yeah. Wouldn't have been much point to that, huh.

[ He pauses, then reaches out to touch Ernesto's shoulder, slow enough that he can see the movement coming and duck away if he doesn't want it. If it's fine, though, then Amos takes it — lightly, because for all the surface level stuff, he knew how it felt after just a day or two, let alone more — and gives him a gentle squeeze. ]

Hold strong. If you don't, come find me. But I hope you do.

[goldendeceiver]

[ Too much credit is being given to Ernesto right now, including not counting him as a selfish guy. He definitely has his fair share of selfish impulses, but maybe the years spent suppressing them to further someone else's agenda has done him some weird good in a way.

His brows might raise up a good centimeter at the hand reaching out towards him, but he doesn't shy away from the touch. While he's not a man prone to displays of physical contact himself, he's also not the type to find it uncomfortable either.

If anything, it's a little nice in this moment. It won't stop him from wasting away, but it is a really solid sign that at least someone here doesn't want to see it happen.

The smile on his face right now could not possibly look any sadder. ]

Thank you.

[ For both the offer and the sentiment. Kind of funny when they both agreed it's probably going to lead to him dying, but he doesn't think Amos means anything malicious at all with that hope. ]

[baltimores]

[ Trying counts for a lot in Amos' book. On some level, maybe he tried, too; it's not like he gave in right away.

Still gave in, though. Has no regrets about it. Hadn't tried all that hard; doesn't have a problem with it. It's only occurred to him that maybe he should have had a problem with his own response upon meeting Ernesto, seeing how they differed.

... Oh well. Can't do anything about it now.

Amos is the type to put it all on the backburner, stop thinking about it entirely. Ernesto's sad attempt at a smile, his clear suffering, is making that really difficult right now, though. Something stirs in him: this is what he should have aimed for, this is the kind of person he should be around; he fucked up. Even if it was for understandable reasons, even if Ernesto gets it on some level, even if he'd do it again: Amos fucked up.

Oh, well.

He nods at the thanks, finds he doesn't really have anything else to add. The sentiment came through: whatever's best for Ernesto is what Amos wants for him. And that's it. That's all he can offer, his own inadequacies really on display now.

He keeps his hand on his shoulder until it's time to go. It's a pittance. He likes to think it's better than nothing. ]

[goldendeceiver]

[ It's just a shame that Ernesto has absolutely no idea what is best for him. It's amazing that anyone else is able to trust his judgements, when he's never been able to trust his own. Maybe if he actually lives through all of this, then he and Amos can have a deeper discussion where Ernesto learns about this, and begs Amos to seriously reconsider any even small amount of blind faith being placed in him.

For now he'll appreciate the company, no matter how quiet it may be. Even when Amos finally gets up to leave, called away by a soldier or for some other reason, he won't complain much; he simply offers a smile as Amos gets back to his feet.

It was nice to be able to get outside of his head for a little while. ]