aionlogs | [open] you know what your problem is?

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[open] you know what your problem is?

WHO: Amos, any Kenoma
WHAT: Amos rewards himself for being cured of Innocence by going on a depression bender.
WHERE: Throughout Achamoth
WHEN: Towards the end of/after the event
WARNINGS: Depression, self-loathing, a little suicidal ideation, lots of drinking, references to brothels, discussion of domestic violence/sexual assault/prostitution/child prostitution; will update as necessary

[ So, this sucks.

Getting out of Venera as soon as possible had been the only thing on Amos' mind once Misa had forced him out of Innocence's grip. That thing had exploited his vulnerabilities, manipulated him, turned him into a puppet to spread its nonsensical, fucked up ~~somewhat understandable~~ agenda, and he needed to leave immediately, before he fell victim to it again.

His legacy's shrine is one of the closest to Achamoth. Easy.

He had to swim across a lake and spend days walking across farmland in waterlogged boots before he actually made it back to the city. Less easy.

Though for all of the personal discomfort and frustration that brought with it, it was readily ignored by spending that time mentally reviewing everything he did while he was fucked in the head, now that he could with proper context. All of the harm he'd caused, all of the ways he'd refused to listen to reason, being reminded of the fact that all he's really good for is ruining other people's lives. Turns out that sucks.

Then there's the fact that ever since an initial mishap during one of his first days in Achamoth, he's been careful to not go out into the city with his shard exposed — but since anything he'd used to cover it up had ended up getting destroyed in Venera, he has no choice but to subject himself to. This. When he's the last person who should be revered or admired in any way, and now he has no way to avoid it.

The first stop on Amos' list is somewhere that can get him clothed again, courtesy of I don't have any money but I am an Aion can I please just have a shirt now. All subsequent stops are, well... ]

i. so just drinking and fucking

[ Going back to the Citadel isn't even remotely on his mind, certainly not when he's got plenty of self-pity to wallow in.

Amos sticks to the seedier parts of Achamoth, weaving his way through various bars and brothels as the mood strikes him. He still doesn't have any money on him, so it's a whole lot of showing off his shard to get either free booze, comped sex, or serve as a credible IOU (and one that, to the meagre credit he has left, he'll actually fulfil once he's had the chance to get his head back on straight and reacquire finances from the Citadel). It isn't hedonism he's fully sinking into so much as I'm a bad person, I feel like shit, I'm going to do things that physically make me feel less like shit. There are worse coping mechanisms, he figures; if there actually aren't, he doesn't care.

He ignores all communion messages he feels coming through; the best anyone can hope for if they try to reach out to him directly is a tacit acknowledgment that he's still alive, combined with maybe a somewhat hazy impression of his immediate surroundings, if that latter part ends up slipping through.

That, or maybe you just so happen to run into him in some shithole dive bar or upon leaving a brothel.

Either way, there really isn't a whole lot he can do if you end up in physically the same space as him, is there. ]

ii. till they run out of one or the other

[ At some point, he actually does have to go back to the Citadel.

He's clearly worse for the wear when he finally shows back up there, rough around the edges when he finally delivers his report to Xishen — several days late, but who's counting — and then has free reign of... well, not the entire place, but the usual.

Fuck, does he need a shower. And a nap. And maybe another drink, because why the hell not. Even though he may not necessarily look it, Amos is certainly feeling better; otherwise, he wouldn't have ended up back here.

Maybe he's dishevelled, maybe he's finally had the chance to clean up; maybe he's briefly roaming the hallways, maybe he's taking advantage of having his own spacious room again. Either way, he's certainly more receptive to company, having gotten most of... that... out of his system in the city.

Though Amos isn't forgetting how easily led astray he was, all in the name of hurting people, anytime soon. That part still bothers him, but when hasn't that been a regular part of his psyche, anyway. ]

iii. wildcard

[ I'm at arii#6412 or

cadiai if we need to talk specifics. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Gray is maybe... a little lost.

Getting a taste of the freedom and (relative) anonymity of Venera has made her less than eager to return to the Citadel with its army of servants and watchful eyes. In greater Achamoth, she can at least attempt to conceal her Aion status. Cloaks and layered clothing are far from conspicuous to the gothic-flavored public, so she blends right in with the populace with her heavy hood and repressed aura. Wandering the streets and getting to know the city is a calming pastime, second only to shutting herself in with a good book.

But today she's probably wandered a little farther than she should have. She's spaced out so badly that she's ended up in a more... wordly part of the city.

This she realizes when a small flock of beautiful, enticingly dressed Achamites beckons for her to join them at the entrance of a plush-looking establishment. Gray stares for a long moment before realizing their likely profession, whereupon her face immediately bleeds into pink. She shakes her head apologetically at them and hastily backpedals for a retreat—

—only to suddenly stumble into someone behind her. ]

[ Not like he'd been watching where he was going, either, but at least to the little credit Amos has left he'd been standing still.

It had been a moment of indecision for him — booze or sex, booze or sex — when he'd been left looking at the outside of the same establishment those Achamites had been trying to draw Gray into. Maybe they were going to be the scales that tipped his decision, at least until he'd felt her bump into him, and even with his delayed reaction time he had enough of an idea as to what had just happened to rest a gentle but firm hand down on her shoulder.

And then he'd looked down, trying to see just what, exactly, had happened, and... oh, fuck. She's small. She's young. She really shouldn't be here, and Amos is hardly in a position to try to help someone else out when he can't even keep track of himself, but it just so happens this is a very specific scenario he'd rather she avoid...

He's too drunk for this. ]

Hey. [ His voice is rough around the edges after some days of abuse, but it's as soft as he can make it all the same. Amos keeps his hand down on Gray's shoulder, but the touch is so light she could easily slip away from it if she wanted to. ] You okay?

[ He really doesn't know what he's going to do if she says that she isn't. Also, he has the sense that he should probably recognize her, but wherever he could have possibly seen her before just isn't coming to him at all. Only so much one can do when you've never really spoken to someone before and you've spent some time dulling your mind on purpose. ]

[ Despite his careful handling, Gray is skittish like a rabbit, startling automatically under his touch. But she doesn't immediately bolt, instead whipping around to look at his face — and a passing familiarity strikes her too, mostly because she recognizes his fluffy beard among the clean-shaven ranks of the Kenoma Aions. It's more of a wild bush now, though.

She backpedals sharply to put a single step between them, worry writ all the way across her face... for herself, but also for him, as unkempt as he is. Even though she hardly knows him, the rough fog of drink is heavy all around him. She's amazed he has the wherewithal to be concerned for her. It probably speaks more for his character than if he were in good shape.

She stares at him for longer than strictly appropriate, taking in his appearance and demeanor with a soft intensity. When she finally speaks up, her voice is quiet, tentative. ]

... I'm lost. [ She admits it readily. ] Would... you be able to help me?

[ He withdraws his hand as soon as she makes it clear that was the wrong move. Just another way in which he's fucked up over the past week and change, add it to his tab—

Amos feels small and helpless at the way she reacts to him, and he kinda wishes he was anywhere else right about now, looking down at his feet as she stares at him. Except then she'd be left on her own in front of a brothel, and it's not the worst thing in the world, but her being on her own...

He looks back up at the sound of her voice, not entirely sure if he'd heard her correctly. But the words make sense. So.

He sighs, brings a hand up to run it through his hair, as though that's gonna fix the dishevelled mess he's let it become. Regards her with what he hopes is a gentle gaze, gentle voice. Thinks he might even partially succeed. ]

Yeah. Yeah, I can try. [ Try, because he's had a spectacular record of failure of doing anything right for a long time, but since Venera in particular. ] Where do you need to go? Even if I don't know where it is, at least I can stay with you until we get there.

[ ... He knows her. He knows her, right? He can't quite place it, but the more Amos thinks on it, the stronger the sense he gets that he should be looking out for her, that they're one and the same. ]

[ In truth, Gray is pretty sure she'd be able to make it back to the Citadel on her own in a reasonable amount of time. Anyone could point her there, so she doesn't need Amos in particular to guide her... but she doesn't get the impression that he's having a good time here, alone with an aura of being beaten down. Somehow, he seems a lot more lost than she is. In a rare fit of deception, she changes her plans. ]

Um... a pet store. Any one is okay.

[ Would he know where one is? He seems like he could either be a very big animal person or very not. It's hard to gauge him when he doesn't seem in full possession of his faculties. His ginger handling and soft gaze would seem to suggest some sensitivity, at least. ]

[ Sometimes you have to get lost on purpose because you don't want to be yourself, is all.

Not that he has the language to explain that, nor even the emotional intelligence at this time to understand that's what he's feeling. He just knows that getting fucked up is better than not being fucked up right now, and that's come to bite him squarely in the ass now that he has someone he actually needs to look out for.

Amos really wishes he could just magically sober himself up. He can't, and that, combined with the request for a pet store has him blinking down at her in comical surprise. He really has no reason not to take her at face value, so, ]

Don't think there are any of those around here...

[ She really is lost if she's looking for a pet store this far into the entertainment district, isn't she? Amos glances around, and... yeah, this isn't the right environment for it at all. Seems like more of a commercial thing.

Guess he's taking a massive detour. He exhales, like he's trying to steady himself; straightens up, intent on leading her out of here. ]

Gonna have to go somewhere else in the city for that, I'm pretty sure. Probably gonna be a bit of a walk actually, if you're up for it.

[ But he's game if Gray is, so, if they're ready to get going... time to get away from this part of the city. Probably make their way to somewhere a bit higher scale.

... A pet store, really?? If they're already on their way, he takes a moment to look back down at her. ]

What're you looking for?

[ Like he has any clue of where to find specifics, but asking doesn't hurt. Right? ]

[ When he stares at her in surprise, she manages not to fidget too much, though she wonders dumbly if he somehow senses her calculation. She's not one for calculation in general; for all she knows, something about her demeanor is making her as obvious as a cat in a fishbowl.

But luckily, Amos is as drunk as a skunk. She visibly relaxes when he seems to agree and goes so far as to straighten up in some sort of mental preparation for the task. She nods eagerly, her bobbing hood an echo of the movement. ]

I don't mind.

[ Walking, that is. She never minds a walk. She's more worried for him and his coordination, but he seems okay for the moment. She glances up at him meekly, but her gaze skates away when she sees that he's already looking down at her. ]

I wanted to get some cat treats. The kind I can keep on me anytime... since I'm not sure when I'll see them.

[ It isn't a lie. It's been on her to-do list. She just hopes it doesn't sound so trivial that he'll be tempted to now ditch her and turn around. In an attempt to distract him from doing just that, she quickly follows up with a question. ]

Um, do you like cats?

[ Real riveting conversation topic. Gray mentally sighs at herself. ]

[ If he was capable of actually analyzing another person's motives or body language — or anything about them, really — at the moment, then Amos might've called into question the way she ducks away. As it stands, though, he just sees a shy girl who needs help — but isn't shying away from him — and it makes sense. It's not something he has to think about too hard, or at all, everything coming together easily at face value.

So a young girl wanting cat treats on her so she can feed cats... yeah, sure. That makes sense to him, and he nods absently, trying to keep his eyes out for anywhere that'd sell something like that. While he's hardly what one could call coordinated, he's doing a decent enough job walking up the street; even has the direction right to a part of the city that looks a little less seedy.

Her question actually throws him, though. Amos turns to look back at her at it, brows furrowing; the motion throws him off and he nearly stumbles before catching himself, falling a step or two behind her in the process. It's easy enough to catch back up — longer legs, longer strides, and all that — before he can think of how to answer her. ]

Dunno. Never really thought about it before.

[ Never... thought about... if he likes cats... Which is not too far off from the answer he'd give if he was sober, actually. Just one of those things that's never come up. He reaches up to absently scratch at the back of his neck, keeping his gaze forward this time. They're not gonna find a pet store here; he doesn't need to be looking around right now. ]

They eat meat, right, but that'd go bad, wouldn't it... You're looking for some kind of kibble?

[ Yeah he knows fuck all about cats, but this has left him plenty distracted now from how much of a mess he is, so it's not like it's a bad thing. ]

[ She thinks her question must have really been abysmal after all when he looks at her like she's sprouted a second head, but her embarrassment quickly scatters when he suddenly stumbles. She slows, her hands half-raised to try to catch him if he falls, but luckily there's no need. Still, she keeps a slightly more vigilant eye on him as they continue on.

Worry presses lightly on her brow. She wonders why he's alone out here getting this drunk without a friend to watch out for him. Something must have happened... well, Venera happened to almost all of them recently. Maybe it dredged up difficult memories and he wanted to be alone. She can't imagine him lacking friends who would be willing to drink with him; he seems nice enough. He could also be shy like she is, she supposes... ]

Something like that. They seem to like smellier foods.

[ Though she can't really go around stinking like fish all day, even if that might multiply her cat attraction power. ]

Have you never had a pet before?

Edited 2022-06-19 20:54 (UTC)

[ He's really gonna have to find Gray when his self-destructive pity party is over and apologize to her, isn't he — particularly when he realizes that she's an Aion, that they live in the same building, have the same boss. But as things stand, her concern goes unnoticed. This is just... something he's doing now. He's fine. ]

Nope. No pets. There were feral cats around sometimes... I might've tried leaving food out for them once or twice. Don't really remember.

[ Don't really remember what kind of food he would've left out, if he left any out at all... any of it, really. He hasn't thought about any of this until Gray had brought it up, any previous experience with cats being an easily forgettable blip in his life and not a whole lot more.

But at least the brothel is far enough behind them now to no longer be a worry. Amos can just... go back there whenever he's done with this. Or go somewhere else. Gray's given him a direction for the time being, which has brought a bit of his more sober mindset back to the forefront, albeit there's still a lot of brain fog for him to stumble through. ]

Your hands are gonna smell if you pick up smellier treats, right? [ Which sounds unpleasant to him, but hey, they're her hands. ] What kinda... what kinda smell is best for cats?

[ He doesn't remember...? She wonders if it's because of his blood alcohol level or his age. ]

Um... I'm not completely sure. [ She admits it with a hint of sheepishness. ] I read that they like catnip, but I've never had any on hand. We only used to keep chickens and sheep — those kinds of animals.

[ As they drift away from the seedier part of the city, the atmosphere seems to clear and the noise begins to settle down around them. It makes Amos seem comparatively out of place, but Gray doesn't mind. If anything, she finds a tiny bit of comfort in the fact that if anyone will be looking their way, eyes will be drawn to Amos first — not that she could ever voice that out loud without sounding terribly rude. ]

Would you... be interested in meeting some cats?

[ She isn't sure what possessed her to ask him that. He seems only mildly interested at best. But in her humble opinion, everyone would benefit from the company of a cat every once in a while. ]

[ He's lived most of his life being out of place, so really, even if Amos was sober enough to notice, he wouldn't have cared. As it stands, though, any eyes drawn to him — and there should be enough, the way he's basically twice Gray's size and can't walk properly in a straight line — are ignored. First, because he's talking to her; second, because they still need to find a pet store.

He looks back down at her at the mention of chickens and sheep. Even manages to not stumble this time as his line of sight changes. ]

You grow up on a farm or something?

[ ... That should probably be a clue that she's not actually from Achamoth, and he isn't all that familiar with farmland in Horos, just that Venera was the kind of place near it. He'll piece together those clues later, though; for now, he idly runs a hand through his beard. ]

D'you have some...? [ Does she already have cats of her own... Either way, it's not a no. Thinking about it further, though, as he walks alongside Gray, all the more conscious of their size and age difference... ] Yeah, sure. I could do that. Guess we gotta get some catnip for that first.

[ Not that he can recognize it in the moment, but this is a significantly healthier distraction from his troubles than his previously chosen activities. For now, though, he's just kinda vaguely having a good time. ]

[ He's surprisingly agreeable, though maybe he wouldn't be if he were sober. She nods quickly with relief. It's hard to say why she's so invested in keeping him away from the bottle when he'll easily be able to turn around and go straight back to it once their mission is complete. ]

They might have some at the store.

[ Luckily, she has the ample budget to accommodate. ]

I grew up in the mountains. It was difficult for merchants to make their way up to us, so we had to be self-sufficient.

[ She realizes now that most people don't live that way, that for many, food only exists as neatly packaged ingredients cooked up into nicely presented plates. It's a little strange to her, but maybe that's just what it means to live in civilization. ]

It was common for everyone to help out by tending the chicken coop or gathering the wool. In the city... I sometimes feel that it's hard to be able to do things with your neighbors in the same way.

[ Oh, yeah, as soon as she doesn't need his help anymore he'll just go right back at it. In the meantime, though, it costs him nothing to try to be a decent person. Worse, he'd hate himself all the more if he'd just blown her off, so this is also something he kinda has to do.

Not that he minds. The alternative to agreeable really isn't worth it. ]

Mountains, huh. Never really been to one before. [ It's an idle thought, his mind latching onto whatever, a little bit behind everything else she's saying... ] I get being self-sufficient though. You can get that in the city, just... different. Like your neighbours don't give a fuck about you, so really, all you can rely on is yourself.

[ It's not the same, but he's more latching onto themes than anything else, and in that way, it. It kinda is. Less a resources issue — though he knows plenty about that too, just in a different way — more in a the world doesn't care, so it's all up to you kind of way. And that, he knows all too well. It's kinda part of the reason they need to end everything, burn it all down.

... Which will have to wait for later, because looking up, Amos is pretty sure that might be a pet store up ahead. Or at least, it looks like what he figures one would... how many other stores have paw print imagery? ]

Think that's one over there. [ He gestures loosely — and inaccurately, but, close enough — with his arm. ] I can... [ what is he offering... ] You think you need any more help? Picking out stuff, or showing me a cat... or... whatever.

[ Yeah he's doing great. At least he's got the spirit. ]

[ Gray isn't totally sure she and Amos are on the same page about self-sufficiency, but it does say something about his point of view. She doesn't think he's completely wrong, either. City life is constantly full of momentum, she feels, and people who are always on the move have less time to stop for the people around them. There's something to be admired about people who are determined to stay busy, but there can be a coldness to them too.

In any case, it looks like they've managed to find a pet store. Gray perks up at the sight of it, then looks over at Amos with gentle confusion at his question before remembering that she shouldn't try too hard to make sense of him right now. ]

... Yes, please. You can come in too.

[ The pet store is cute and friendly, especially by Achamoth's aesthetic standards, and it turns out there are some puppies tumbling around in the window display. It's a modestly-sized store, but jam-packed with rows of food and tanks of small animals for sale. Gray pads in and begins to cruise the few aisles for suitable cat treats. Though she's been swallowed up by the shelves, she calls out softly to Amos. ]

You can pick out anything you like.

[ Alright, then. She technically doesn't need him anymore, but he's as suggestible as ever and even less likely to question things given his inebriated state, so he just follows her in. Maybe she'll pick out something big and he'll need to carry it for her, who knows.

And promptly gets lost staring at anything remotely unusual (which, considering how he's never had a pet in his life, is kinda... most things in here), so Gray's voice is a welcoming beacon. ]

Don't got any pets... don't think there's anything for me here.

[ Except, well, her. He looks up, around, eventually finds the aisle she's in. And, at least for this part, he's got enough wits about him to not broadcast his voice. ]

Don't even got any money on me. [ And while he's been more than content to push his Aion status as a means to get free drinks or sex, something about being in a pet store has him not wanting to do that. ] I dunno. You're the boss here.

[ He really is just along for the ride. Doesn't even occur to him to question how long this particular ride has been going for him, though. Not like it's anything bad... He just likes her, is all. Has been happy to let Gray lead the way. It's really as good a use of his time as anything else. ]

[ His answer knocks at a strange door in her subconsciousness, and with a start she realizes why that is: his subservience is a lot like hers, a placid following without question or desire, safe with the will of the other person. It isn't anything unusual in itself, but she can safely say that she's never been the person captaining a venture. It's completely alien to her that someone else would place themselves in her hands in this way, let alone a near stranger. She wonders if other people feel this way about her, wondering why she would want to tag along so obediently.

Maybe it feels especially strange because of his tough-looking exterior — though she knows not all people can be judged by their appearances. It just feels a bit like a boar willing to be led along by a rabbit.

She thought he might be interested in any interesting-looking toys, but since he isn't, she just plucks up a catnip toy on a small mock fishing rod along with a bag of dried meat treats. After a quick chat with the store owner, Gray easily hands over the necessary jools and comes away with the treats and the toy, and makes sure Amos is still following along before heading out. She begins to lead them toward the looming Citadel, where she knows some friendly cats roam. ]

My name is Gray, by the way. I don't think I've thanked you yet for helping me.

[ He really is content to just be her shadow. It's how his life has gone, albeit maybe not exactly like this: find someone good and let them lead you. It's also something he's been lacking since Venera, but to slip back into the old, familiar pattern might actually be a good thing for him. Amos is still fucked up, still not ready to properly face reality again, but it's like dipping his toe back in the water and thinking yeah, I can do this later, even if the timing isn't right yet.

So he passively watches her as she makes her selections, then passively follows her out. To him, the Citadel is nothing more than a vague shape looming in the distance; he knows he doesn't want to go there yet, but in its direction is fine. Kinda feels like it's everywhere sometimes.

Ugh. Later he'll go back there proper—

Oh. He blinks down at Gray, confused, like he didn't expect to be thanked.

After a moment probably a little longer than would've been socially acceptable, ] Amos. I— [ wasn't doing anything anyway. Didn't really do anything. Am kind of just a selfish asshole— ] don't mind. 's no problem.

[ Her hood tips curiously at his odd pause(s), but she otherwise just nods and lets a comfortable silence lapse between them as they amble along. She scans the streets slowly for signs of local catlife, willfully ignoring the eyes of the citizens that look their way.

It takes a longer time than she would have liked to drag a new acquaintance around for, but in the end she finally spots a friend in the distance; she curves away from the main road and down a quiet thoroughfare. She slows, her footsteps becoming delicate and her voice even softer as she approaches a black cat sitting on a brick partition, its round blue eyes watching them approach curiously. ]

Okay, Mr. Amos... Ah — have you ever met a cat before?

[ It sounds silly, but it needs to be asked... ]

[ Amos is pretty much blind to anyone else's gaze, the result of being both too inebriated to notice and a natural disposition that he wouldn't care anyway. Gray's kinda the only person in his orbit now, so he'll keep following her until that's no longer something to be done. There's a second or two of delay when she switches directions for him to pick up on following her, but he does, his pace slowing alongside hers.

And then he's left staring at the cat. And, upon her voice softening, he lowers his as well to a soft sort of drawl. ]

Not in a really long time.

[ Probably decades, at least.

But even if he isn't entirely familiar with cat behaviour, he knows what it means for him to be, well, him. That he can be an imposing figure, even without meaning to. So he makes sure to keep himself rooted just a step behind Gray, not moving but for the occasional blink, eyes fixed on the cat's otherwise. ]

Ah...

[ With her hands full, she makes do with delicately waving the toy fishing rod in Amos's line of sight in an attempt to divert his attention. As a bonus, the cat seems interested as well... ]

S-So, you don't want to make direct eye contact with him... because cats can find that aggressive. It's better if you act disinterested and let him come to us first.

[ Gray feels the intimidation of direct eye contact on a cellular level. Maybe it's why she gets along with most animals. ]

I've met this cat before, so I think he'll come over soon. We just have to be a little patient.

[ She sets the treats on the floor and hunkers down at a crouch. After a moment, she beckons for Amos to join her. ]

[ Waving the toy works, the movement catching Amos' gaze. When she essentially explains why she did that, there's an internal wince on his part; he'd fucked up.

Though at least it was in a way that didn't actually hurt anybody, so he's not going to beat himself up over it. A quick glance, and the cat's still there. And again, Gray's movement catches his gaze, and he slowly — gingerly — lowers himself to a crouch beside her, choosing to look at the treats instead.

His voice is soft when he speaks again, like he's concerned he'll scare the cat off; is taking steps to ensure he doesn't. ]

I can do patient. [ Hell, he's proving pretty good at following all of her directions; no reason why this one would be an exception. ] You've met him before... You're really good with animals, huh?

[ It's less a question, more a compliment. Everything he's seen and from what she's told him, yeah, she's good with animals. That's a field he's probably never gonna know, so it only makes sense to give credit where it's due. ]

[ She isn't sure if she'd say she's especially proficient with animals — maybe just average compared to everyone else in her home village. But to someone who has very little experience with animals overall, she can see how she might seem good with them. Another little idiosyncracy about city living. She concedes, ]

Better than I am with people, at least.

[ Animals are straightforward. Anyone can learn to read an animal with enough time and intent, including Amos, she's sure. Meanwhile, human beings are shifting and complicated, turning their faces in a hundred configurations like Rubik's cubes. She feels like people rarely even understand themselves. ]

Animals... they just want to be safe. In their minds, every person is capable of killing them. Since they don't understand words, they have to find clues about people in other ways. They see the things most people don't think about. Things like the quality of your footfalls... the shape of your posture... the path you take to approach... and sometimes even the way you blink.

[ She nods once to herself, the cat toy bobbing playfully on the end of the fishing rod with her motion. ]

There are a lot of emotions in people's everyday behaviors. I think language makes people forget that.

[ He's silent for a long moment, contemplating her words. Hell, between how long it's starting to get since he's had his most recent drink and the subject matter they've stumbled on, he might even be starting to sober up a bit. ]

Think I might relate more to animals than people, then.

[ His voice is still low and gentle, like he's still concerned about scaring the cat, like he's increasingly aware of what someone of his size and appearance represent. Some of that's genetic; some of it's on purpose. They just want to be safe. In their minds, every person is capable of killing them. Amos learned that firsthand, too.

Though he's reasonably confident Gray is not one of those people. He raises his head slightly, eyes shifting towards her, cat still in his peripheral vision so he knows it's at least there, even if it's kinda just a dark blob in the background. ]

I dunno about emotions necessarily, but I get what you mean. Bodies are a lot easier to read than words. Someone says they aren't gonna do something but they tense up, then they probably are kinda thing. It's the one universal language we got.

[ If he thinks about it — when he thinks about it, later, when he's back at the Citadel and properly sober — there's some kind of burgeoning kinship here, isn't there. She's kind. She makes a lot of sense. He gets it. ]

[ She's mostly relieved that he's open to what she's saying, and she realizes suddenly that she's been doing more talking to him than she would normally consider comfortable with a near-stranger. She wonders which of the two of them is more peculiar for getting along with the other.

As she ponders this, there's movement in the corner of her eye: the cat dropping smoothly from its perch so that it can approach them, its soft round gaze flitting curiously between Gray, Amos, and the suspended cat toy. Gray peeks at the cat from around the edge of her hood before wiggling the toy on its line enticingly. The cat's interest is thoroughly piqued, and its gaze sticks to the toy like velcro. Gray makes it dance a little more until the cat gets close enough to bat a pink-beaned paw at it.

Now that the cat has warmed up a little, Gray offers the catnip toy on a stick over to Amos. ]

Do you want to have a try, Mr. Amos?

i.

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